re: #819 LudwigVanQuixote

So perfectly well said. It would be impossible to say this in a university setting, but I have often wondered, what is the root of such fear of sexuality?

The will to dominance and mastery is wired deep into us. For most, this includes a determination to exercise self control.

For control freaks, it can be most vexing to not even be in control of their own thoughts and feelings. But sexuality too is wired deep into us. Normal people manage to strike a balance, with the control intervening at the stage between impulse and actions-that-would-be unwise or wrong. Marriage greatly simplifies all this, if it goes well, but it’s not the only path.

The control freak gets to thinking along the lines of—-if only women didn’t dress `provocatively’, I wouldn’t be troubled by unwilled and unwanted surges of lust. If only men didn’t (fill the blank), I wouldn’t be troubled by (fill the blank.)

Very few find themselves so constituted that they can lead this “untroubled” life, and for those that cannot accept a working compromise with the sexual side of their nature, the whole matter of sex becomes an infuriating civil war, self vs. self, that spills over into fear and anger with displacement targets—-anything that serves as a trigger for desire, and anybody who disagrees with the remedy one has in mind.