In the latest installment of our ongoing series, EU suit Miguel Moratinos seems to be the only one willing to spend time with the grizzled old murderer these days.

About the baby wipes: I think they’re on to us. They’re making sure no embarrassing blue dispensers show up in the Chairman’s photos.

The other mysterious icons are still there. Cross. Dome of the Rock paperweight. Water bottle.

But come on, Abu! That pile of papers is really getting ridiculous now. Put it under the desk or something. You’re not fooling anybody. Spend a little more time on paperwork and a little less on arranging your keffiyeh in the shape of Israel.