Sawah Pawin soon on Discovewy Channew!

We wiww show you the reaw Amewica, with aww the wawts and bwemishes! But you won’t see me getting my asshowe wipped wide open by “peopwe” who don’t wike me, because that’s not what I’m getting paid fow. I’m hewe to show you an Amewica wike you’ve nevew seen befowe, one that Pamewa Gellew would be pwoud of, if she ever ventuwed beyond the safety of hew apawtment in Bigotville, NY, wewe she gets gawanteed vodka dewivewies, or youw money back!”

This message brought to you by Citizens for Universal Brain-Death.