OT: Notes from a non-profit thrift store furniture department employee.

Today was the first time I got to really become one with our industrial sized compactor machine. Did you know that you can put a whole 8 foot long, very ugly Mediterranean dresser in that machine, and it will snap it in half like it was Poland? It does wonderful things with used worn out Sony Trinitron TV’s (is that gas spewing out from the picture tube toxic?). And the piece de resistance was the side by side refrigerator and freezer, folded up like a Michelin map. One word of advice, stand back, it’s amazing how high heavy metal parts can be propelled into the air.

There is something personally satisfying about having that much power at your fingertips, with the simple push of a button. I want one for my backyard, or maybe the living room. Can you imagine the fun you could have at your barbecues with the compactor and beer cans?

Note: always check the inside of the refrigerator for small dead animals or discarded midget prostitutes.

Next week I learn all about store security.