re: #135 sagehen

rrrjewishtrivia.com
While elephants are kosher (they chew their cud and have cloven hoofs), as a practical matter nobody is slaughtering elephants in a kosher manner, due to the near-impossibility of severing the trachea and esophagus in a single stroke. In 1997, a shochet (ritual slaughterer) in Mea Shearim announced plans to slaughter an elephant, having developed a precision titanium-steel blade which he claimed could accomplish the task; however, he canceled his plan after huge protests from animal rights activists.

There’s also the fact that elephants are smart, they mourn their dead, they have language… and their young are SUPER-CUTE OMG HOW COULD YOU THINK OF EATING ONE?!?!

Don’t think of them as pachyderms. Think of them as really large veals.

By the way, have you ever noticed that “veal” isn’t a really a thing until it stands in for “Baby cow meat that is really pale because they aren’t exposed to sunlight and are fed milk until they are slaughtered?” I mean, does any one ask “How many veals did your cows produce this spring?”

Seems like an advertising term so that you don’t have to feel like you are eating “Baby cow meat that is really pale because they aren’t exposed to sunlight and are fed milk until they are slaughtered.”

Maybe I’m overthinking this.

But I don’t think so.

And veal, by the way, is fucking delicious.