As the sole computer-savvy member of my county VFD, tonight I have yet again had to de-bug the station PC because of the injudicious—and prolific—consumption of pornography on insecure and spyware-saturated porn sites. What really awes me is that they: (1) absolutely refuse to listen to my advice on how to find porn without turning the PC into a virus-infested zombie, (2) pretend that they didn’t do it, no matter what the browser history and cookies say.

I know far more about what the (R)-voting, god-fearing, family-values, good-Christian men of my hometown are into than I ever wished.

Ban porn and I’ll make a fortune racketeering.