7. Make Christianity the official religion and English the official language of the United States, because native English-speaking, Christian folks are the only truly patriotic Americans.

Now you’ve got to be careful with this one, or we might end up with the “Christianity” Pope Marxist I preaches.

The only safe bet is to go with the version preached by people like Reverend Billy Joe Bilbo who went to one of the only true Bible Colleges, all of which reside in the Deep South.