Coach (not a coach after he was fired over leading prayers with his high school team) Dave Daubenmire has settled on how much money he wants from the NFL, Jennifer Lopez, Shakira, and Pepsi for daring to broadcast such a “pornographic” show into his home and disturbing his younger son. (His older son was convicted of possession of kiddie porn.)

He claims “viewing what they put on the screen endangers his going to Heaven” and wants to claim the NFL is sending him to Hell in a courtroom .

(Discovery should be fun if it got that far: Prove there is a god, a heaven, or a hell.)

What he’s really looking for is “Christian oppressed” points.

He told Daily Caller he would be satisfied with a $867,000,000,000 (that’s trillion) settlement.

He’s looking for a lawyer to represent him, which he put out on his show.

wkyc.com (WKYC Channel 3, Cleveland)