This is the single greatest day in history! Since the swearing in all I’ve seen is dancing in the streets, all pollution in the air mysteriously disappeared, and no one around the world wishes harm on the United States anymore! President Obama has only been president about 7 hours and he is already the greatest president we’ve ever had! We should believe every word he says, and back his programs 100%. Otherwise we are only living in the past and bringing up old racist, fascist memories. We can no longer dissent against a sitting President because that’s just not the nice thing to do! It doesn’t matter that you have no idea what Obama’s economic or foreign policy plans are, that’s of no concern to you! Just believe!

/I’m applying for a job with the Associated Press :P