re: #282 Cato the Elder

These new Progressive glasses are somewhat hard to adjust to. But I can already tell it’s going to be worth the effort.

First off, everything that was murky now looks plain as day. My mind is clearer now.

I’m feeling compassion for people I used to ignore. Just gave Crazy Mike the Schizo Bum a five-spot. And some advice. Told him to start shaving again because in the business he’s in, a big lumberjack beard is not conducive to profits.

The glasses also have “transitions”, meaning they go from clear to dark in bright light. So when a nuclear burst of lies about how higher tax rates on billionaires like Limbaugh is going to ruin the country appears, I am protected from sudden blindness.

As a non-political bonus, spring is almost here and the Hopkins girls are coming out of hibernation and wearing skimpier clothing by the day. What was a blur now resolves itself into a curvaceous derriere, or even a nipple.

All in all, I’m mighty pleased.