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Onion: Decoy Website Launched to Lure Morons

447
Gus10/21/2011 8:32:13 am PDT

re: #443 iossarian

You can pay to settle criminal charges? Who knew?

It reminds me of this…

No Jail For Hit-And-Run Driver Who Plowed Into Cyclist
‘Outraged’ Victim Says Hedge-Fund Manager Fled Scene, Covered Up Role

EAGLE, Colo. — A hit-and-run driver who plowed into a cyclist in Vail will has been sentenced to probation, community service and making charitable donations — a sentence that has outraged the victim.

Eagle County District Judge Frederick Gannett on Thursday night sentenced the driver, Martin Erzinger, to 90 days in jail, but suspended the jail time.

Instead, Erzinger, 52, will lose his driver’s license for a year and have to take a leave of absence from his Denver hedge-fund manager job and complete 45 straight days of community service. He’s also ordered to make charitable donations, instead of paying court fines…

That’s how it works. Even on a personal level. When you’re one of the haves.