Mornin’ all…this is too fucking hilarious. An Open Letter from “concerned members of the Florida House of Representatives” regarding safety measures (panic buttons) given to state Senators (but not them) after the latest passage of the gun law.

Favorite snippets:

We couldn’t help but notice that our colleagues in the Senate were provided with enhanced security measures as a result of our controversial – but patriotic! – decision to allow licensed owners of concealed weapons to carry their loaded guns through the corridors of the Capitol.

And…

We’d be fibbing if we said every single member of the House actually read this bill and comprehended all its ramifications. Basically, we took the NRA’s word that it was no biggie. Ever since October 1, anybody with a concealed-weapons permit can bring their favorite pistol to beaches, parks, even public libraries. Most legislators weren’t too worried because, seriously, who the heck still goes to a library? Not us!

This is my favorite…broken sentence as originally written for emphasis…

Bearing in mind that citizens occasionally get angry at their politicians, and also bearing in mind that even a normally sober firearms owner can have a bad day, the NRA kindly allowed us to bar gun toters from the legislative chambers and committee rooms, where we conduct the

important business of selling out to special interests.

However, the law doesn’t prevent armed voters from freely walking the hallways of the Capitol, or visiting the offices of we the undersigned. Consequently, we were intrigued by media reports about the so-called panic buttons that have been given to members of the Senate, even to the Democrats who voted against the darn law. Not that we have an inferiority complex, but we who serve in the House are curious to know why our phones weren’t also equipped with emergency devices.

miamiherald.com