I’ve posted this before, but early in my first marriage we were uninsured, making shit wages as substitute teachers, and going to the ER was our only option when my wife got sick. Hours were spent sitting in the emergency room. It was a sickening experience, but I was too proud to call my parents (my dad was a practicing doctor) to get cadillac treatment for free.

Later, after I got my first teaching job, we had Kaiser (the next best thing to being uninsured)…another ER visit there(my ex was often sick, come to think of it), and yes, we still had to wait several hours. One night, I watched a Hispanic family across from us in the waiting room. I said, “Their daughter’s about to give birth.” My wife argued with me, saying that Kaiser was known for their OB work and they’d never leave a woman in labor in the waiting room. A few minutes later, the girl broke her water…and sat there in wet sweats for another hour. A few hours later, my wife is getting treated and while I’m waiting for her and I see the girl on a gurney in the hallway, scratching the walls with her fingers as she’s having contractions. Finally fed up with the whole thing, I walk into the room where they’re treating my wife and shout, “THIS GIRL’S HAVING A FUCKING BABY OUT HERE! WHY AREN’T YOU HELPING HER?” A nurse turns and says, “She says she’s not pregnant.” That set me off…I told them I saw her break her water now three hours earlier and she’s clawing the paint off the fucking walls right now. One nurse peaks out into the hallway, says, “Oh shit!” and the scramble was on.

Apparently she was trying to hide the pregnancy from her parents who were with her, but really, when someone’s THAT pregnant, there’s no denying it.

Oh, and the fucking nurses never thanked me for pointing out the obvious. Apparently they didn’t like my tone.