re: #43 Dark_Falcon

Hey Dark:

In honor of your troubles, here’s a very short story of mine. It’s part of a longer work. I hope you enjoy it:

And sometimes the world just comes together. Okay, one time only it came together for me, but it was deeply affecting. Basically:

One of my thousand-and-one random talents is the ability to run down stairs really really really fast. I don’t know why, who knows, hard to figure, but I can beat anyone going downstairs. It sounds like machinegun fire when my feet hit down. I also mentally like the idea of going downstairs, especially underground, you really feel like you’re getting somewhere, you know? Okay, upstairs works too, but it’s a different kind of feeling going upstairs, it gets more portentous and bound every moment with every step you take, that pain in your thigh hits you know and you have to say, “Is this shit at the top of these stairs worth it?” and have to have a moment of introspection before you finish off the flight. But downstairs I just fly down, it’s like I’m going to run clear out of the world at the bottom or something.

Anyway right, so the serendipity was this:

Remember that night at Franks I told you about? I think I told you about it. Anyway, downtown in San Francisco, out on the streets, I see the guy! The one who stole my hat that night, who was fucking putting it on and grinning as he went out the door. It sucked, and here he was. I was glad my memory was right for once and he was a tiny little rat dude and not a Bighunk McChestgriddle kind of guy, so I could go crazy on him without insurance.

So I was shouting “Hey” immediately and barreling to him, caroming little old Chinese ladies off me (and they totally got where I was coming from, you could tell from the looks in their eyes, this one old modom in a frilly hat number especially, she valued hats and she totally got me) and I must have looked like a white sharkfin ploughing through a sea of Asia because he looked up and saw my anger and did an ‘oh shit’ and scampered. He ran along the street a bit and I was hitting my stride but honestly thinking fuck because I wasn’t really gaining or anything but then the stupidshit bolted down some stairs to the MUNI train station. He bolted down the stairs. I needed to catch up to a dude and he was going down the stairs. It was so good I almost screwed it all up by getting overexcited but my mind and body dodged that and I just clicked and went into my “I am a robot designed to run down stairs” mode and I machine-gunned down and it was fucking perfect so perfect that when I caught up to him and grabbed him around the shoulders I wasn’t even mad anymore I was laughing like a bastard and he got so scared from that he like went a bit faster and I caught up AGAIN and he went like “Gah” and fell forwards and I passed him while he pinwheeled down the last five steps and I turned around to watch him plant his face like a failed flower into the harsh concrete and I said, “Beat you.”