Just for the heck of it I googled that shut up quote. Some guy Ring Lardner (who I never heard of) has a few gems:
“An optimist is a girl who mistakes a bulge for a curve.”
“He looked at me as if I were a side dish he hadn’t ordered.”
“The family you come from isn’t as important as the one you’re going to have”
and
“‘Are you lost, daddy’ I asked tenderly. ‘Shut up,’ he explained.”