I have internet. I havent had internet in about three years. I feel a tad bit weepy for all I have missed. Going without internet didnt make me thinner or wiser or more handsome. Going without internet for someone like me who for several years lived with all of my extremities rooted deeply in the internet, is like going without internet for someone like me who for several years lived with all of my extremities rooted deeply in the internet.

Hi internet. Hi lizards.