re: #238 ggt

separation anxiety?

I don’t think so. More like what Cato described— some attempt to provoke a response and a conversation like that.
I always ask them if they’ve considered all the outcomes of sending such an email or letter. They’re generally fixated on the idea that they’ll get back some wonderful loving response which will say You’re absolutely right about everything you’re saying.

I always ask, Why are you sending this? What if that ISN’T what happens? What if you get a nasty response? What if you get NO response? What if you get (most likely situation) some very short noncomittal response, like “I’m sorry you feel that way”?
If you can honestly say that you’ll feel better having sent that email even with any of the above alternatives, ok, fine.

If not? Then it isn’t about closure, it’s about getting something from someone else. ‘Closure’ isn’t something someone can do for you.