Today on life with GOHMERT! special guest ALAN KEYES!

There isn’t enough popcorn
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Kick back and enjoy the crazy, because there’s boatloads when these certifiable whackadoodles get together!

Rep. Louie Gohmert (R-TX) filled in for Tony Perkins on the Family Research Council’s Washington Watch radio program yesterday where he interviewed ultraconservative activist Alan Keyes. He reminisced about voting for Keyes for president and different gatherings they both addressed, a conversation which naturally progressed into a discussion of how elitist forces threaten to cull the world’s population and turn everyone into slaves.

Keyes, who thinks gay marriage will lead to the “murder of the masses” and believes Obama’s gun policies are part of his plan to have people “slaughtered by the thousands and the hundreds of thousands” in order to “cull the herd” of the world’s population, told the Texas congressman that political “elites” seek the “depopulation of the globe.”

The former presidential candidate said efforts to prevent “global warming, which has been proven to be wrong,” are part of a plan to “cut back the population of the world.” Keyes also made a reference to Bill Gates, who has been attacked by conspiracy theorists for explaining that vaccinations and increased healthcare access slow down population growth.

YouTube

Read on, because Keyes - a charter member of the birther ward - goes on to reveal how TEH SKARY GAYZ, particularly gay marriage, and “hedonism, pleasure, self-satisfaction and self-contentment,” can be connected to America’s economic problems. And Dr. Keyes would know this, how…exactly…?

Got something you’d like to share with the class Dr. Keyes?

More: Louie Gohmert and Alan Keyes Tackle Gay ‘Hedonism,’ Cull of Earth’s Population

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60 comments
1 erik_t  Tue, Aug 27, 2013 10:39:38am

Why would DHS have stockpiled OMFGBILLIONS of bullets if they’re only going to depopulate us by the hundreds of thousands? I mean, hell, that’s only like fifty per SEEKRIT FEMA TANK.

Derp.

2 jaunte  Tue, Aug 27, 2013 10:43:39am
Keyes - a charter member of the birther ward - goes on to reveal how TEH SKARY GAYZ, particularly gay marriage, and “hedonism, pleasure, self-satisfaction and self-contentment,” can be connected to America’s economic problems.

I don’t suppose he’s thinking about the Walton family.

3 wrenchwench  Tue, Aug 27, 2013 10:45:55am

re: #2 jaunte

I don’t suppose he’s thinking about the Walton family.

John Boy Walton or Sam Walton family?

4 dog philosopher  Tue, Aug 27, 2013 10:46:21am

hedonism, pleasure, self-satisfaction and

it’s all the fault of them kids and their crazy ya-ya music

5 Ace-o-aces  Tue, Aug 27, 2013 10:46:36am

Can someone please explain to Mr. Keyes that the X-files was fiction.

6 Dr. Matt  Tue, Aug 27, 2013 10:46:52am

It President Obama wanted to “cull the herd”, he wouldn’t have to take one single firearm away from anyone. One word: ‘drones’. And 2 more words: ‘tactical nukes’.

7 Vicious Babushka  Tue, Aug 27, 2013 10:48:01am
8 jaunte  Tue, Aug 27, 2013 10:48:52am

re: #3 wrenchwench

The Sam W. folks:

California taxpayers are spending $86 million a year providing healthcare and other public assistance to the state’s 44,000 Wal-Mart employees, according to a new study by UC Berkeley’s Institute for Industrial Relations.
ilsr.org

9 Lidane  Tue, Aug 27, 2013 10:56:23am

OUTRAGE!

10 Carlos Danger  Tue, Aug 27, 2013 10:58:46am

re: #9 Lidane

It’s worth noting that the state GOP wanted to run Brady out on a rail for his support of gay rights.

11 Romantic Heretic  Tue, Aug 27, 2013 11:04:10am

Once again proving that severe mental illness is not a barrier to holding public office.

12 lawhawk  Tue, Aug 27, 2013 11:08:07am

Facebook’s sharing data with governments around the world, not just the US. They’ve released their government data requests stats for the 1st half of 2013:

The report details the following:
Which countries requested information from Facebook about our users
The number of requests received from each of those countries
The number of users/user accounts specified in those requests
The percentage of these requests in which we were required by law to disclose at least some data
The report covers the first 6 months of 2013, ending June 30.

As we have made clear in recent weeks, we have stringent processes in place to handle all government data requests. We believe this process protects the data of the people who use our service, and requires governments to meet a very high legal bar with each individual request in order to receive any information about any of our users. We scrutinize each request for legal sufficiency under our terms and the strict letter of the law, and require a detailed description of the legal and factual bases for each request. We fight many of these requests, pushing back when we find legal deficiencies and narrowing the scope of overly broad or vague requests. When we are required to comply with a particular request, we frequently share only basic user information, such as name.

The request by a government for Facebook data can take any number of forms, including warrants and subpoenas, and the form and method varies by country.

Facebook requires the jurisdiction to provide requests in a specific format, and includes guidance on what the company will do if the request is in relation to child endangerment or imminent harm to a person.

The most requests have come in from the US (rather obvious), but India is next. They’re followed by the UK, Italy, and France. Not every request is met with an information release.

13 lawhawk  Tue, Aug 27, 2013 11:12:23am

re: #11 Romantic Heretic

Fat, drunk and/or stupid can get you into Congress….

14 allegro  Tue, Aug 27, 2013 11:12:46am

re: #12 lawhawk

Facebook’s sharing data with governments around the world, not just the US. They’ve released their government data requests stats for the 1st half of 2013:

The request by a government for Facebook data can take any number of forms, including warrants and subpoenas, and the form and method varies by country.

Facebook requires the jurisdiction to provide requests in a specific format, and includes guidance on what the company will do if the request is in relation to child endangerment or imminent harm to a person.

The most requests have come in from the US (rather obvious), but India is next. They’re followed by the UK, Italy, and France. Not every request is met with an information release.

And I bet the data Facebook mines from its users is sold without a thought to anyone with a buck willing to pay it.

15 A Mom Anon  Tue, Aug 27, 2013 11:14:58am

Someone doth protest just a bit much there. Honest to god these freaking people think about gay sex and what gay people do more than any gay person I’ve ever met.

I think someone’s jealous.

16 Backwoods_Sleuth  Tue, Aug 27, 2013 11:17:48am

I haz a new great-grandson…born at 10:22 a.m. today, weighing in at seven pounds.

first baby picture!

17 Bulworth  Tue, Aug 27, 2013 11:18:53am
Rep. Louie Gohmert (R-TX) filled in for Tony Perkins on the Family Research Council’s Washington Watch radio program yesterday where he interviewed ultraconservative activist Alan Keyes.

Filled in as radio hoster? Don’t these people have jobs?

18 SpaceJesus  Tue, Aug 27, 2013 11:19:13am

A couple more counties in NM are starting to issue SSM licenses: San Miguel and Valencia. Both are kind of in ABQ’s metro area.

19 Vicious Babushka  Tue, Aug 27, 2013 11:20:02am

re: #16 Backwoods_Sleuth

I haz a new great-grandson…born at 10:22 a.m. today, weighing in at seven pounds.

first baby picture!

MAZAL TOV!

Still waiting for those twins.

20 Bulworth  Tue, Aug 27, 2013 11:21:10am

re: #7 Vicious Babushka

Today on the 700 Club, Pat Robertson told co-host Terry Meeuwsen that gay men in cities like San Francisco attempt to spread HIV/AIDS to others by cutting them with a special ring when shaking hands.

It would be irresponsible not to speculate…..

//

21 Lidane  Tue, Aug 27, 2013 11:21:31am

re: #15 A Mom Anon

Someone doth protest just a bit much there. Honest to god these freaking people think about gay sex and what gay people do more than any gay person I’ve ever met.

I think someone’s jealous.

Seriously. I know plenty of LGBT people. They’re not nearly as interested in what people do in their bedrooms as social conservatives are.

22 dog philosopher  Tue, Aug 27, 2013 11:22:17am

re: #12 lawhawk

Facebook’s sharing data with governments around the world, not just the US. They’ve released their government data requests stats for the 1st half of 2013:

The request by a government for Facebook data can take any number of forms, including warrants and subpoenas, and the form and method varies by country.

Facebook requires the jurisdiction to provide requests in a specific format, and includes guidance on what the company will do if the request is in relation to child endangerment or imminent harm to a person.

The most requests have come in from the US (rather obvious), but India is next. They’re followed by the UK, Italy, and France. Not every request is met with an information release.

imagine that

even facebook has more oversight than the FISA court

23 Lidane  Tue, Aug 27, 2013 11:22:24am

re: #16 Backwoods_Sleuth

I haz a new great-grandson…born at 10:22 a.m. today, weighing in at seven pounds.

first baby picture!

Congrats!

24 dog philosopher  Tue, Aug 27, 2013 11:23:22am

re: #17 Bulworth

Filled in as radio hoster? Don’t these people have jobs?

gohmert discovered that his mouth would be unoccupied for a two hour period

25 NJDhockeyfan  Tue, Aug 27, 2013 11:23:39am
26 Internet Tough Guy  Tue, Aug 27, 2013 11:26:32am

Matt Damon hearts treason.

Does he have any movies premiering in Russia soon?

Fun fact: if you try to make a comment including a heart made from < and 3, all the text after it will be deleted from your post.

27 BongCrodny  Tue, Aug 27, 2013 11:27:28am

re: #17 Bulworth

Filled in as radio hoster? Don’t these people have jobs?

No, not really.

28 Lidane  Tue, Aug 27, 2013 11:33:11am

re: #17 Bulworth

Filled in as radio hoster? Don’t these people have jobs?

Would you rather have GOHMERT! flapping his pie hole on the radio or doing his real job in Congress?

29 Gus  Tue, Aug 27, 2013 11:34:34am
30 Kragar  Tue, Aug 27, 2013 11:37:08am

Thanks so fucking much Texas.

31 Internet Tough Guy  Tue, Aug 27, 2013 11:38:09am

re: #29 Gus

[Embedded content]

Are you sure? Are you REALLY sure you want to say that?

32 Bulworth  Tue, Aug 27, 2013 11:38:29am

re: #28 Lidane

That’s a good point. Carry on Gohmert!!

33 Carlos Danger  Tue, Aug 27, 2013 11:40:37am
34 Gus  Tue, Aug 27, 2013 11:41:09am

re: #31 Internet Tough Guy

Are you sure? Are you REALLY sure you want to say that?

Iran’s Revolutionary Guards are in Syria fighting with the government.

35 Bubblehead II  Tue, Aug 27, 2013 11:41:17am

re: #29 Gus

Ouch! That is going to leave a mark.

36 ProTARDISLiberal  Tue, Aug 27, 2013 11:41:37am

re: #18 SpaceJesus

The total list of counties with SSM in New Mexico are:

Dona Ana
Santa Fe
Bernalillo
Valencia
San Miguel

Missing anyone?

37 ProTARDISLiberal  Tue, Aug 27, 2013 11:45:49am

Also, 54.5% of the state lives in county with SSM.

I really hope my interview was okay.

Also, I killed the thread. Again.

38 erik_t  Tue, Aug 27, 2013 11:48:31am

This is a nice distillation of That Other Thing, perhaps succinct enough to share with grumpy old family members and whatnot.

First World Problems: “My latte is too hot, the DVR Didn’t Record ‘Dexter’ and the NSA Has My Metadata”

The steady drip, drip, drip of recent revelations about the National Security Agency has some liberals in a panic. The Republic is in peril, they warn. The faux progressive occupying the White House is a “snake” says Oliver Stone. “Worse than Bush,” insist Glenn Greenwald and his worshippers followers. The United States no longer has a functioning democracy, declares Jimmy Carter. Human sacrifice. Dogs and cats living together … Mass hysteria.

Yawn. To paraphrase Jay Z, I’ve got 99 problems, but the NSA ain’t one. Well, not a very big one, anyway. But it is a distraction, and a troubling one. For two and a half months now, it seems the Left has been talking about little other than Edward Snowden and Glenn Greenwald (okay, some of it is Glenn Greenwald talking about Glen Greenwald, but still …).

Last I checked, the official unemployment rate was still 7.4% […]
The GOP’s war on women continues unabated […]
Immigration reform is stalled in the House […]

39 Ace-o-aces  Tue, Aug 27, 2013 11:48:48am
Keyes, who thinks gay marriage will lead to the “murder of the masses” and believes Obama’s gun policies are part of his plan to have people “slaughtered by the thousands and the hundreds of thousands” in order to “cull the herd” of the world’s population, told the Texas congressman that political “elites” seek the “depopulation of the globe.”

You know, I first heard of this conspiracy theory that “elites” wanted to “depopulate the globe” back in college. Since then, world population has increase by about two billion. This is the most ineffective conspiracy ever!

40 Vicious Babushka  Tue, Aug 27, 2013 11:50:25am

re: #39 Ace-o-aces

You know, I first heard of this conspiracy theory that “elites” wanted to “depopulate the globe” back in college. Since then, world population has increase by about two billion. This is the most ineffective conspiracy ever!

The wingnuts on Twitter keep on Tweeting that OBAMA IS A COMMUNIST!!!11!!

Meanwhile the 1% keep getting richer while everybody else stagnates. OBAMA TOTALLY SUCKS AT COMMUNISM!

41 Carlos Danger  Tue, Aug 27, 2013 11:59:47am

Well this certainly explains part of why the first Hobbit movie sucked so badly:

Ian McKellen: ‘Filming ‘The Hobbit’ made me cry with frustration’

Ian McKellen has revealed that he became so frustrated filming green screen scenes for The Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey that he burst into tears on set.

And I cried, actually. I cried. Then I said out loud, ‘This is not why I became an actor.’ Unfortunately the microphone was on and the whole studio heard.’

42 Lidane  Tue, Aug 27, 2013 12:00:06pm

re: #30 Kragar

Thanks so fucking much Texas.

We’re not all bad around here. Also, we make damn good BBQ.

43 Kragar  Tue, Aug 27, 2013 12:02:16pm

Pat Robertson thinks gay people are ninjas.

Robertson: Gay People Deliberately Spread HIV/AIDS By Cutting People With Special Rings - See more at: rightwingwatch.org

44 Vicious Babushka  Tue, Aug 27, 2013 12:02:25pm

re: #41 Carlos Danger

Well this certainly explains part of why the first Hobbit movie sucked so badly:

Ian McKellen: ‘Filming ‘The Hobbit’ made me cry with frustration’

What’s he complaining about? He didn’t have to wear the fake prosthetic ears and noses and hairdos that were loaded on the other actors.

45 Lidane  Tue, Aug 27, 2013 12:03:04pm

re: #43 Kragar

Pat Robertson thinks gay people are ninjas.

Robertson: Gay People Deliberately Spread HIV/AIDS By Cutting People With Special Rings - See more at: rightwingwatch.org

Wasn’t that shit debunked 30 years ago?

46 Vicious Babushka  Tue, Aug 27, 2013 12:03:24pm
47 EPR-radar  Tue, Aug 27, 2013 12:04:00pm

re: #43 Kragar

Pat Robertson thinks gay people are ninjas.

Robertson: Gay People Deliberately Spread HIV/AIDS By Cutting People With Special Rings - See more at: rightwingwatch.org

Charming. Robertson is trying to see if he can invent a ‘blood libel’ to use against GLBT people that sticks.

Hate in action.

48 Kragar  Tue, Aug 27, 2013 12:04:09pm

re: #45 Lidane

Wasn’t that shit debunked 30 years ago?

You’re forgetting that Pat is at least 100 years behind the rest of us.

49 NJDhockeyfan  Tue, Aug 27, 2013 12:04:13pm
50 BongCrodny  Tue, Aug 27, 2013 12:04:16pm

Breaking Miley: Hank and Marie watch the Video Music Awards

(It’s a mashup of Breaking Bad and Miley Cyrus at the Video Music Awards. The “Breaking Bad” clip is from Sunday night’s episode; I don’t think it spoils anything, for those who haven’t yet watched.)

51 Vicious Babushka  Tue, Aug 27, 2013 12:04:25pm

If Satan really possessed Miley, he would have given her better dance moves.

52 Carlos Danger  Tue, Aug 27, 2013 12:04:50pm

re: #46 Vicious Babushka

[Embedded content]

Wow, that site.

SYMBOLS RUUUUULE THE WOOOOOORLD!

53 A Mom Anon  Tue, Aug 27, 2013 12:08:47pm

re: #46 Vicious Babushka

I’m gonna chalk it up to too much money, no common sense and bad parenting.

It must be nice to be able to blame all your dipshit mistakes and dumbass ideas on some imaginary guy who has a pointy tail, horns and lives in a hot place no one’s ever seen(except in their fevered imaginations).

54 lawhawk  Tue, Aug 27, 2013 12:12:09pm

Never been a fan of WalMart, but they’ve announced that they’re going to be extending benefits to employees’ domestic partners.

But don’t worry—Wal-Mart’s newfound magnanimity isn’t due to a sudden appreciation for gay rights. According to a memo sent to employees by Sally Welborn, the company’s senior vice president of benefits, and leaked to Joe.My.God., the move is “a business decision, not a moral or political decision.” Welborn claims that following the Supreme Court’s invalidation of DOMA, “states are developing different definitions of marriage, domestic partner, civil union, etc. By developing a single definition for all Walmart associates in the U.S. and Puerto Rico, we are able to ensure consistency for associates across our markets.” (Translation: Anthony Kennedy made us do it.)

We shouldn’t undervalue Wal-Mart’s decision, inevitable as it may be in light of DOMA’s demise: The move will undoubtedly bring significant new benefits to thousands of gay couples across the country. Still, Welborn’s emphatically apolitical reasoning is a little strange. Most American companies seize on their gay friendly policies to attract the LGBT crowd, even engaging in a little pro-gay activism and marketing to corner the LGBT market share.

55 Ming  Tue, Aug 27, 2013 12:12:42pm

re: #33 Carlos Danger

Zimmerman to ask state of Florida to cover $300k in defense expenses

Omigod. What a shocking story.

56 Lidane  Tue, Aug 27, 2013 12:14:15pm

re: #54 lawhawk

Never been a fan of WalMart, but they’ve announced that they’re going to be extending benefits to employees’ domestic partners.

That’s nice and all.

How about extending real wages and benefits to your hourly employees?

57 lawhawk  Tue, Aug 27, 2013 12:15:06pm

re: #41 Carlos Danger

Wait. Magneto and Gandalf doesn’t like performing in front of a green screen? That’s after doing significant green screen in both the LOTR trilogy and in the XMen series.

I get why he might be upset with the over-reliance on green screen but you are creating a world that doesn’t exist. Your options are to do practicals and on-location shoots, or green screen. Both come with costs and limitations.

I’d frankly be more upset with the fact that Jackson’s Hobbit looked bad visually due to the 48fps. It made everything look off.

58 lawhawk  Tue, Aug 27, 2013 12:15:33pm

re: #56 Lidane

Wouldn’t want to hurt the bottom line. /

59 Feline Fearless Leader  Tue, Aug 27, 2013 12:19:35pm

re: #51 Vicious Babushka

If Satan really possessed Miley, he would have given her better dance moves.

And probably have her play a fiddle as well.
//

60 Pacific moderate  Tue, Aug 27, 2013 5:08:29pm

Remember we can thank Keyes for launching Obama’s national career. I expect his nether regions are still smarting from that senate election.


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