re: #140 GeneJockey

If you’re not there when it happens, be prepared NOT to feel devastated immdiately.

My Mom died in PA, where I grew up, while I was here in CA. Dad didn’t want to deal with a funeral, since Mom had specified cremation anyway, so I didn’t fly back - also because Dad didn’t want to deal with a lot of people right then.

I felt - odd. I knew she was gone, but I didn’t feel anything like as awful as I thought I would. I kept waiting for the other shoe to drop, but it didn’t. I wondered if I was some kind of emotionless monster.

We had a memorial service at the house 5 months later, and I wept like a baby. It wasn’t real till then.

YMMV, of course, but these things hit people differently.

When my brother was killed, I didn’t feel anything but I kept thinking “if we can get the ambulance to him in time he’ll be OK” over and over.