Fighting bloggers from the sky
fearless men who watch Glenn Beck cry
Men who type what they don’t dare say—
the brave men of the Screen Beret.

Cheeto dust upon their chest
these are men — Americas best
one hundred men will blog today but
only three win the Screen Beret

Trained to live off Mountain Dew
Trained in ‘combat’ at LGF 2
Men who seethe by night and day
courage take from the Screen Beret.

—Jimmah-Ice productions. The Ballad of The Screen Berets, dedicated to armchair warriors everywhere.