Well you have to include the Russians and Chinese in there too since they think he’s a Commie. Oh and Nazis.
Soviet Agent: He will have to be a great Communist like Stalin.
Chinese Agent: You mean like Mao
Soviet Agent: No, I said Stalin
Chinese Agent: Mao
Muslim Agent: Now, now gentlemen he has to be a Muslim too
Nazi Agent: He has to be a Nazi too.
Soviet Agent: This is getting ridiculous. A Communist Nazi Muslim.
Muslim Agent: Yes, that’s what they’ll think too but he will be the only Communist Nazi Muslim in history who enjoys basketball and beer.
All four: (laugh manically)