Stephen Colbert: 'Not Intended to Be Factual'

And I've been to the local Walgreens on numerous occasions, whether it to be to drop off/pick up prescriptions, grab general meds, or to grab a newspaper. Never once have I seen an advertisement anywhere in the store offering pap smears. Maybe I'm just looking in the wrong aisle.

AK-47% Tue, Apr 12, 2011 12:57:31pm

re: #3 Targetpractice, Worst of Both Worlds

Last time I was in a Wal-Mart I saw a combination corndog/twinkie maker. I guess the new version includes a pap smear.

Kragar Tue, Apr 12, 2011 12:57:52pm

I am so proud of the GOP right now. They are just so smart and caring.*

*not intended to be factual

AK-47% Tue, Apr 12, 2011 12:58:42pm

Reagan cut taxes and shrank the government.

Targetpractice Tue, Apr 12, 2011 12:59:09pm

re: #6 ralphieboy

Reagan cut taxes and shrank the government.

*coubullshitgh*

AK-47% Tue, Apr 12, 2011 12:59:42pm

Mussolini made the trains run on time

jamesfirecat Tue, Apr 12, 2011 1:00:15pm

re: #8 ralphieboy

Mussolini made the trains run on time

Napoleon was short.

Killgore Trout Tue, Apr 12, 2011 1:00:59pm

More comedy...
Rand Paul Gives Senate Lesson In Ayn Rand And Light Bulbs (VIDEO)

The Republican agenda is based on fiction.

S'latch Tue, Apr 12, 2011 1:01:00pm

Walgreens! I laughed. (And, so did Colbert.)

Obdicut Tue, Apr 12, 2011 1:01:09pm

re: #9 jamesfirecat

Napoleon was short.

God is in the Constitution.

garhighway Tue, Apr 12, 2011 1:01:22pm

John Kyl has a vestigial tail.

Targetpractice Tue, Apr 12, 2011 1:01:37pm

re: #10 Killgore Trout

More comedy...
Rand Paul Gives Senate Lesson In Ayn Rand And Light Bulbs (VIDEO)

The Republican agenda is based on fiction.

Hey Rand, if you start traveling out west now, you might reach Galt's Gulch by Friday.

Kragar Tue, Apr 12, 2011 1:02:27pm

I love that even he couldn't even keep a straight face.

AK-47% Tue, Apr 12, 2011 1:02:54pm

Point is there are Higher Truths. Minor factual lies are allowed - even necessary - to bring us closer to The Truth.

Jesus' mother was a virgin.

Killgore Trout Tue, Apr 12, 2011 1:04:05pm

re: #14 Targetpractice, Worst of Both Worlds

Hey Rand, if you start traveling out west now, you might reach Galt's Gulch by Friday.

Heh. Think progress notes that he is also misinterpreting the book. Moron.

jamesfirecat Tue, Apr 12, 2011 1:04:28pm

re: #15 Kragar (Proud to be Kafir)

I love that even he couldn't even keep a straight face.

I haven't seen such an epic comedy central failure since Jon Stewart tried to look solemn while John Oliver read of list of Britain's War Dead...

Page 3 in the Binder of Women Tue, Apr 12, 2011 1:04:33pm

Colbert has been tweeting all day/nite with the hash tag #NotIntendedToBeAFactualStatement

StephenAtHome Stephen Colbert

Jon Kyl developed his own line of hair care products just so he could test them on bunnies. #NotIntendedToBeAFactualStatement

garhighway Tue, Apr 12, 2011 1:05:56pm

More Colbert tweets, via TPM:

And as of Tuesday morning, Colbert had taken the ribbing to his twitter account, where he's been frequently posting such non-factual gems as, "Carly Simon wrote that song about Jon Kyl," and, "Jon Kyl calls the underside of his Senate seat: 'The Booger Graveyard.'"

Targetpractice Tue, Apr 12, 2011 1:08:40pm

re: #17 Killgore Trout

Heh. Think progress notes that he is also misinterpreting the book. Moron.

I honestly don't think half the morons in Congress who claim to worship Ayn Rand have ever actually sat down and read Atlas Shrugged, just picked up the Cliff Notes book at their local bookstore or had a page give them the "highlights."

I recommend they play an hour or so of Bioshock, then get back to me about all the wonders and marvels of objectivism.

lawhawk Tue, Apr 12, 2011 1:08:52pm

re: #20 garhighway

I'm surprised he didn't go with the obvious - Boehner is an Oompa Loompa.

zora Tue, Apr 12, 2011 1:09:58pm

re: #12 Obdicut

in it. he wrote it.

AK-47% Tue, Apr 12, 2011 1:11:17pm

In the name of the Founding Father, the Founding Son and Founding Holy Ghost!

Kragar Tue, Apr 12, 2011 1:18:41pm

re: #24 ralphieboy

In the name of the Founding Father, the Founding Son and Founding Holy Ghost!

SWEET ZEUS'S BEARD!

SanFranciscoZionist Tue, Apr 12, 2011 1:20:30pm

re: #25 Kragar (Proud to be Kafir)

SWEET ZEUS'S BEARD!

According to my husband, who has been watching "Spartacus: Blood and Sand", that is not the part of Jupiter most commonly sworn by.

Mattand Tue, Apr 12, 2011 1:21:01pm

@Targetpractice #21

I recommend they play an hour or so of Bioshock, then get back to me about all the wonders and marvels of objectivism.

Heh. I was always amazed I didn't hear of more libertarians whining about Bioshock's storyline. Fantastic game, regardless of your politics.

The next game in the series, Bioshock Infinite, sounds like it'll be questioning American exceptionalism and rabid, unquestioning jingoism. Watch Fox News and the rest of the Conservo-sphere go apeshit over what will invariably see as the game's "anti-American" dogma.

garhighway Tue, Apr 12, 2011 1:21:50pm

This from Andy Borowitz:

[Link: www.borowitzreport.com...]

Glenn Beck Moves to Sci Fi Channel
No Format Change Necessary

NEW YORK (The Borowitz Report) – Landing on his feet just hours after his program was dropped by Fox News Channel, controversial host Glenn Beck announced today that he had just inked a new contract to join the cable network Syfy, formerly known as the Sci Fi Channel.

Speaking at a press conference announcing the move, Mr. Beck told reporters, “The best part of this deal is that I won’t need to change my format at all.”

Mr. Beck said that his program was “a perfect fit” for a schedule of programming packed with aliens, paranoid conspiracy theories and alternative universes.

But the TV host’s enthusiasm was tempered somewhat by Syfy spokesperson Tracy Klugian, who told reporters, “We warned Glenn that if he’s going to be a good fit for Syfy he’s going to have to tone down his act a bit. Some of the stuff he did on Fox is a little too ‘out there’ for us.”

Mr. Beck said that his new deal would run “until 2012 or the end of the world, whichever comes sooner,” and that he would be paid in gold bullion and ammo.

Meanwhile, Congress reassured the American people that during a government shutdown essential services would still be provided to Libya, Afghanistan and Iraq.

Kragar Tue, Apr 12, 2011 1:23:02pm

re: #26 SanFranciscoZionist

According to my husband, who has been watching "Spartacus: Blood and Sand", that is not the part of Jupiter most commonly sworn by.

BY THE MOOBS OF JUPITER!

Mattand Tue, Apr 12, 2011 1:23:54pm

Regarding the Colbert segment: as I said on Facebook, what's amazing is these idiots know the camera is on and recording. They literally dont' care that they're lying.

Christ, can you imagine if Obama did something like that? Seriously, John Kyl is a US Senator and his office is admitting that he's just making shit up.

Kragar Tue, Apr 12, 2011 1:26:49pm

Someone had too much time on their hands and really loved Colbert on the show "Strangers with Candy"

Youtube Video

Petero1818 Tue, Apr 12, 2011 1:50:26pm

Perhaps it's just my Canadian sensibilities, but wouldn't deliberately misleading the senate from the floor be conduct worthy of some form of official censure.

recusancy Tue, Apr 12, 2011 2:07:45pm

re: #32 Petero1818

Perhaps it's just my Canadian sensibilities, but wouldn't deliberately misleading the senate from the floor be conduct worthy of some form of official censure.

You're only not allowed to lie about blow jobs in America.

Randy W. Weeks Tue, Apr 12, 2011 2:55:57pm

But it was intended to be propaganda.

ass

mr.fusion Tue, Apr 12, 2011 4:01:10pm

re: #19 Stanley Sea

Colbert has been tweeting all day/nite with the hash tag #NotIntendedToBeAFactualStatement

StephenAtHome Stephen Colbert

Jon Kyl developed his own line of hair care products just so he could test them on bunnies. #NotIntendedToBeAFactualStatement

This guys seriously is a genius

Some of my favorites:

Jon Kyl has a shrine to Scooter from the Muppet Show. #NotIntendedToBeAFactualStatement

Jon Kyl was sent from the future to kill Sarah Conner. #NotIntendedToBeAFactualStatement

For the past ten years, Jon Kyl has been two children in a very convincing Jon Kyl suit. #NotIntendedToBeAFactualStatement

Jon Kyl calls all Asians "Neil" no matter what their name is. #NotIntendedToBeAFactualStatement

[deleted] Tue, Apr 12, 2011 7:40:47pm

Obdicut Tue, Apr 12, 2011 8:04:23pm

re: #36 Longhorn95

Except performing abortions isn't killing babies.

But you knew that. That's why you're dead-thread shitting.

[deleted] Tue, Apr 12, 2011 8:24:12pm

Charles Johnson Tue, Apr 12, 2011 8:31:48pm

Just go away. You people make me sick.

Spy Mode Auto

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