Chuck Johnson Responds to Gawker With 111-Page Fantasy Novel, Hilarity Ensues

A massive word salad
Law • Views: 66,951

Last night @AdamSteinbaugh downloaded and posted to Scribd one of the strangest and most incoherent legal documents ever submitted to a federal court: Chuck C. Johnson and his lawyer John Burns’ long-awaited (and several times postponed) reply to Gawker’s legal team. (I suspect large parts of this were written by Chuck himself, because it just reeks of his self-aggrandizing style.)

Here’s the document, folks; it checks in at 111 pages of sheer loony wonderfulness. And what you should know up front is that US courts in Missouri have a strict rule prohibiting filing motions longer than 15 pages. So right off the bat, he’s probably irritating the hell out of a federal judge by submitting this exceedingly verbose screed.

Scribd

There’s so much whargarrbl and so many falsehoods in here I don’t even know where to start writing about it!

Chuck seems to be arguing that he’s a public figure who’s very famous for his journalism, but shouldn’t be considered a public figure when anyone says mean things about him. He’s simultaneously a world-renowned “journalist” and a very private figure with tender feelings that have been damaged by those meanies at Gawker and only $66 million will soothe them. For example:

However, prior to Defendants conspiring to manufacture disgusting rumors about him, which are provably false, Johnson was never a public figure for purposes of the topical areas of public defecation and bestiality.

He attempts to explain why he filed this suit in Missouri by bringing up the St. Louis Cardinals and the Michael Brown story, with this awesome heading:

Of course, anyone who actually followed Chuck’s “investigations” of Michael Brown knows he built the exact opposite of “good will.” He engaged in blatant, ugly race-baiting smears and on more than one occasion actually said Michael Brown deserved to die. Chuck spent no more than four days in Missouri, for a court hearing on his failed attempt to unseal Michael Brown’s juvenile records (in which he falsely claimed to have evidence Brown was convicted of second degree murder while underage) — and never actually went to Ferguson at all.

A cynic might conclude the case was filed in Missouri because that’s where Chuck Johnson’s lawyer John Burns is licensed to practice, and no other reason.

Typos abound, and some of them are hilarious.

Presumably, the court also can has cheezburgers.

There are about 50 pages in here that deal with Chuck’s alleged floor-pooping incident, for which he’s become a very famous public figure indeed. Chuck claims this rumor originated at Gawker — which is simply false. In fact, this rumor was first published at the blog Chuck himself maintained while an undergraduate at Claremont-McKenna, and those comments from 2011 remain visible to this day.

Here’s a true classic, destined to go down in history as one of the best section titles ever written in a legal document:

Then, after all of these words and incoherent arguments, Chuck’s attorney concludes with this:

For the foregoing reasons, Plaintiffs request that the Court deny Defendants’ Motion to Dismiss and Motion to Strike or Dismiss Pursuant to the California Anti-SLAPP Law. Alternatively, should the Court find in favor of Defendants, Plaintiffs pray that this Court grant them leave to file an amended complaint, that the court stay its determination as to Defendants’ Anti-SLAPP motion pending discovery, and that the Court, should it find jurisdiction lacking, transfer the case to a Federal District Court in California, and any other relief this Court deems just and proper.

Yes, he’s asking the judge to suspend all of Gawker’s motions and if he doesn’t, he’s pleading for the judge to allow him to file another lawsuit and allow them to do discovery despite Gawker’s anti-SLAPP motion (which blocks discovery), and then after all the absurd attempts to justify filing in Missouri… consents to transferring the case to California.

Also uploaded by Chuck’s lawyer last night, this fantastic affidavit:

I’ll let the lawyers out there deal with the legal issues raised by this humongous word salad, if indeed there are any legal issues. @AdamSteinbaugh is reportedly working on a post, and I’ll update with a link to it when it appears. But to my non-lawyer eyes, this looks like a total and complete fail, and I won’t be the least bit surprised to see the judge throw the book at Johnson and his legal eagle.

UPDATE at 10/17/15 2:55:30 pm by Charles Johnson

Here’s Adam Steinbaugh’s post, plunging into the legal weeds in search of something nourishing and not finding much: Lawsplainer: Why Chuck C. Johnson Is About to Get MOED Down.

Also see

Jump to bottom

205 comments

1
Dr Lizardo  Oct 17, 2015 • 11:18:06am

Chucky’s meltdown is gonna be one for the history books.

2
The Ghost of the Beardsman  Oct 17, 2015 • 11:18:58am
3
CuriousLurker  Oct 17, 2015 • 11:19:09am
However, prior to Defendants conspiring to manufacture disgusting rumors about him, which are provably false, Johnson was never a public figure for purposes of the topical areas of public defecation and bestiality.

Reposting from downstairs:

4
KGxvi  Oct 17, 2015 • 11:21:43am

From what I read last night, the arguments are utter bullshit. But that last bit about denying the motions or alternatively granting leave to amend is pretty standard fair for any opposition on these types of issues. In other words, that’s about the only part that wouldn’t be used in the legal ethics text book in the chapter “What Not To Do”

5
Amory Blaine  Oct 17, 2015 • 11:22:37am
6
Stanley Sea Toujours  Oct 17, 2015 • 11:26:30am
7
CuriousLurker  Oct 17, 2015 • 11:28:25am

I think it would probably help if the lawyer didn’t sound like he was writing captions for I Can Has Cheezeburger.

8
The Ghost of the Beardsman  Oct 17, 2015 • 11:32:46am

re: #7 CuriousLurker

I think it would probably help if the lawyer didn’t sound like he was writing captions for I Can Has Cheezeburger.

Keeping in mind that Chuck and his lawyer are both marginally-acceptable in the shallow pools of stupid ideas they frequent.

Shit floats, but they are the especially buoyant corn-flecked poop.

9
A Cranky One  Oct 17, 2015 • 11:38:28am

CCJ pooped on the floor?

Won’t get close otherwise!
10
Skip Intro  Oct 17, 2015 • 11:39:45am

As much as I’d like to believe that Fucked UpChuck and his lawyer will get slammed by the judge for this pile of crap, I have to remind myself that Orly Taitz has been filing similar crap for almost a decade now, and has only received one financial sanction that I’m aware of.

11
Charles Johnson  Oct 17, 2015 • 11:45:59am

Just for the record - I’ve said this before, but I’m no fan of Gawker. Their editor John Cook slimed me in an extremely dishonest way a few years back. But Chuck Johnson got on my permanent shit list when he actually stalked me at what he thought was my apartment, and I’m on Gawker’s side in this cage match.

12
Nyet  Oct 17, 2015 • 11:48:52am

Where can I read the full affidavit?

13
Charles Johnson  Oct 17, 2015 • 11:50:02am

Meanwhile, Chuck has another big idea today.

14
Nyet  Oct 17, 2015 • 11:51:08am

re: #11 Charles Johnson

Gawker deserves to go down, but since Chucky won’t be the one to do it, we may as well enjoy the show of his humiliation. Scumbags fighting scumbags? Pass the popcorn!

15
Charles Johnson  Oct 17, 2015 • 11:52:00am
16
Charles Johnson  Oct 17, 2015 • 11:54:02am

Whoa. Approaching 1500 Twitter hits in less than 40 minutes. This one’s taking off. (In case anyone’s wondering why I still write about Chuck occasionally.)

17
Charles Johnson  Oct 17, 2015 • 11:54:25am

Over 1500 now!

18
De Kolta Chair  Oct 17, 2015 • 11:57:39am

Most likely, Chuckles walked into a bar near his seedy motel, bought round after round for the locals on his tab, told tale after tale of his many feats of award-winning journalism, and then snuck out the bathroom window amidst the chaos of last call.

19
Lidane  Oct 17, 2015 • 12:00:06pm

There are landmark SCOTUS rulings shorter than that steaming pile of fail.

I wouldn’t be surprised to see the judge toss this out and sanction Chucky’s legal team for not following the directions. Fifteen pages is not a suggestion.

20
Charles Johnson  Oct 17, 2015 • 12:03:21pm

re: #19 Lidane

There are landmark SCOTUS rulings shorter than that steaming pile of fail.

I wouldn’t be surprised to see the judge toss this out and sanction Chucky’s legal team for not following the directions. Fifteen pages is not a suggestion.

The rules allow motions longer than 15 pages IF they get leave from the judge. Which they didn’t do, of course. Burns probably didn’t even know about that rule.

21
Nyet  Oct 17, 2015 • 12:05:45pm

One other thing to consider: 111 pages must have costed quite a bit.

22
allegro  Oct 17, 2015 • 12:06:06pm

Chuck is such a trend setting, insightful journalist that he thinks AM is still a thing. A big thing. It was barely a thing when it was an actual thing. Way back when.

23
Charles Johnson  Oct 17, 2015 • 12:09:52pm

re: #21 Nyet

One other thing to consider: 111 pages must have costed quite a bit.

I suspect Burns is doing this pro bono.

24
GlutenFreeJesus  Oct 17, 2015 • 12:11:11pm

re: #13 Charles Johnson

Meanwhile, Chuck has another big idea today.

Embedded Image

What’s his “program”? Alt-F?

25
Nyet  Oct 17, 2015 • 12:11:16pm

re: #23 Charles Johnson

I suspect Burns is doing this pro bono.

Advertisement, birds of a feather or both?

26
Charles Johnson  Oct 17, 2015 • 12:12:44pm

re: #25 Nyet

Advertisement, birds of a feather or both?

They’re definitely birds of a feather. Burns is notorious for his far right Tea Party activities in Missouri.

27
KGxvi  Oct 17, 2015 • 12:13:37pm

re: #20 Charles Johnson

The judge might have been willing to cut him some slack if he’d been around fifty pages since he did a combined opposition to three different motions. But since he more than doubled that number, my guess is the judge won’t be happy. And I’m guessing the first draft of the chambers memo from the judge’s clerk is “fuck this guy”.

28
allegro  Oct 17, 2015 • 12:14:59pm

re: #27 KGxvi

The judge might have been willing to cut him some slack if he’d been around fifty pages since he did a combined opposition to three different motions. But since he more than doubled that number, my guess is the judge won’t be happy. And I’m guessing the first draft of the chambers memo from the judge’s clerk is “fuck this guy”.

… after he finishes laughing his ass off.

29
Charles Johnson  Oct 17, 2015 • 12:16:41pm
30
gocart mozart  Oct 17, 2015 • 12:18:42pm

Perhaps a LOL Cat wrote it. (from page 78)

II. PLAINTIFFS’ OPPOSITION TO DEFENDANTS’ MOTION TO DISMISS
A. THIS COURT CAN HAS PERSONAL JURISDICTION OVER DEFENDANTS

31
Joe Bacon  Oct 17, 2015 • 12:22:49pm

re: #2 The Ghost of a Flea

Embedded Image

I hate to break it to Ginger Snapped, but he ain’t no George Washington…

32
Barefoot Grin  Oct 17, 2015 • 12:22:52pm

pro bono to advertise broadly his incompetence? Seems like a strange business model.

33
gocart mozart  Oct 17, 2015 • 12:26:57pm
Plaintiffs note that it was Defendants who published defamatory statements about Plaintiffs, and that it was Defendant Howard who first reached out to Plaintiff Johnson regarding the rumors of public defecation and bestiality.

(pg. 81)

What’s the bestiality claim, I hadn’t heard that one.

34
gocart mozart  Oct 17, 2015 • 12:29:05pm
As a scrappy young reporter trying to establish a brand in a very competitive industry, Johnson is clearly a limited public figure for the purposes of his career - a journalist.

(pg. 81)
They spelled crappy wrong.

35
Joe Bacon  Oct 17, 2015 • 12:29:05pm

re: #33 gocart mozart

(pg. 81)

What’s the bestiality claim, I hadn’t heard that one.

Hint: The Gene Wilder segment in Woody Allen’s Everything You Wanted To Know About Sex But Were Afraid To Ask

Willy Wonka Makes Love To A Sheep

36
De Kolta Chair  Oct 17, 2015 • 12:31:07pm

They’ve already written their appeal…

37
KGxvi  Oct 17, 2015 • 12:31:17pm

re: #34 gocart mozart

Damn autocorrect

38
Nyet  Oct 17, 2015 • 12:31:42pm

re: #33 gocart mozart

(pg. 81)

What’s the bestiality claim, I hadn’t heard that one.

Now you did, thanks to the lawsuit.

39
PhillyPretzel  Oct 17, 2015 • 12:34:15pm

I love PBS. The Concert in Central Park re-run. whyy.org

40
PhillyPretzel  Oct 17, 2015 • 12:35:36pm

re: #38 Nyet

Hot asian wife’s cat was rubbing against his leg. /

41
Nyet  Oct 17, 2015 • 12:37:05pm

I do hope that Chuck can proceed with the lawsuit tho.

1. Imagine the discovery phase.

2. Imagine Chuck being interrogated about his affidavit. “Sir, are you sure you did not have sexual relations with that sheep?”

I rest my case.

42
goddamnedfrank  Oct 17, 2015 • 12:38:40pm
43
lawhawk  Oct 17, 2015 • 12:40:17pm

re: #18 De Kolta Chair

He claims to have spent that amount of money. Fact or fiction?

It doesn’t cost that much to file motions. It certainly doesn’t cost that much for airfare or hotels in the Greater STL area. However, spending all your time in a bar drinking yourself into an incoherent stupor? That’s downright priceless.

There’s no reason for Chucky to have filed in Missouri but for the fact that he found a lawyer willing to try this nonsensical raving.

I can only hope that the federal court judge treats this accordingly and hands Chucky and lawyer their hats - and sanctions Chucky’s lawyer, but I doubt he’ll go that far.

He should though. This is one of the most thoroughly screwed up briefs I’ve ever come across. Add to that the fact that he knowingly went over the page limit for a motion of this kind, and you know that his lawyer is playing a real special game of crazy chicken.

Courts may give pro se parties the benefit of doubt on filings - they’re non lawyers after all, but this one makes some of those kinds of filings look downright professional.

What a mess Chucky unleashed on the legal system. It makes floor shitting look downright quaint.

44
lawhawk  Oct 17, 2015 • 12:42:10pm

re: #42 goddamnedfrank

He’s never been caught lying? Oh really? Does he realize that there’s discovery and plenty of evidence that he’s lied in his “professional” capacity as a “journalist”? That includes many of his statements regarding Michael Brown.

45
Timothy Watson  Oct 17, 2015 • 12:43:01pm

re: #42 goddamnedfrank

[Embedded content]

Notice that UpChuck didn’t limit his sexual activity to just female human beings.

46
Skip Intro  Oct 17, 2015 • 12:43:59pm

re: #32 Barefoot Grin

pro bono to advertise broadly his incompetence? Seems like a strange business model.

In the world of wingnut welfare normal rules don’t apply.

47
gocart mozart  Oct 17, 2015 • 12:43:59pm

re: #23 Charles Johnson

I suspect Burns is doing this pro bono.

Nah, he wants his one third share of that sweet sweet 66 million semolians.

48
Nyet  Oct 17, 2015 • 12:44:20pm

re: #45 Timothy Watson

Notice that UpChuck didn’t limit his sexual activity to just female human beings.

Well, he’s not a female…

;)

49
Nyet  Oct 17, 2015 • 12:46:30pm

re: #47 gocart mozart

Nah, he wants his one third share of that sweet sweet 66 million semolians.

                           JOE
               So you knew this thing was just a 
               ride the whole time?

                           DIZZ
               Yeah... You thought you could really 
               travel through time?

                           JOE
               Well... Yeah. I guess.

                           DIZZ
               Boy, for the smartest guy in the 
               world, you're pretty dumb.

                           JOE
               Well, why didn't you tell me?

     Dizz is a little embarrassed.

                           DIZZ
               I like money... Sorry.

                           JOE
               But if it's not a real time machine 
               there wouldn't have been any money.

     Long beat on Dizz, trying to put it together, then...

                           DIZZ
               Ooooooh yeeeah... Shit.
50
goddamnedfrank  Oct 17, 2015 • 12:46:39pm

re: #47 gocart mozart

Nah, he wants his one third share of that sweet sweet 66 million semolians.

If Burns didn’t reverse the usual contingency arrangement and demand two thirds he’s an even bigger idiot than I thought. There was literally no other lawyer in the country willing to take the case, that’s how Chuck ended up going with him.

51
lawhawk  Oct 17, 2015 • 12:47:10pm

re: #20 Charles Johnson

The rules allow motions longer than 15 pages IF they get leave from the judge. Which they didn’t do, of course. Burns probably didn’t even know about that rule.

There’s reasons for the 15 page limit. To promote efficiency of the court system - and you have to get right to the point. The ability to request an extension is up to the Court to allow, given the potential complexity of the case or issues.

This is hardly the case requiring a 111 page (or even 50 page) motion of this kind. It shows what kind of lousy lawyer Chucky had because he simply can’t distill the issue into a concise argument.

Well, there’s that and the fact that it looks like it was a cram session with nothing but cut and pastes from various sources so as to throw a steaming pile of BS. There isn’t so much as a legal argument or a factual argument to be found that would inure benefit to Chucky. It’s 111 pages of incoherent rage monkey chattering.

52
gocart mozart  Oct 17, 2015 • 12:48:58pm
I have never had sexual contact with anyone other than a human.

Deposition question #1

“Mr. Johnson, did you or did you not ever have sexual contact with a tube sock? Remember, you are under oath.”

53
lawhawk  Oct 17, 2015 • 12:49:18pm

re: #44 lawhawk

Then there’s his conduct in the Ebola outbreak too. Where he claimed to have sources saying this and that. And making unsupported assertions all along the way. That’d make for some mighty fine discovery-ing too.

54
PhillyPretzel  Oct 17, 2015 • 12:49:35pm

re: #51 lawhawk

They are throwing everything they can, hoping that something will stick.

55
gocart mozart  Oct 17, 2015 • 12:49:37pm

re: #50 goddamnedfrank

Meh, what’s two thirds of nothing?

56
Lidane  Oct 17, 2015 • 12:50:50pm

re: #55 gocart mozart

Meh, what’s two thirds of nothing?

Chucky’s IQ?

57
The Very Reverend Battleaxe of Knowledge  Oct 17, 2015 • 12:51:28pm

re: #23 Charles Johnson

I suspect Burns is doing this pro bonzo.

Fixxed.

58
lawhawk  Oct 17, 2015 • 12:52:01pm

re: #54 PhillyPretzel

Yes, it’s the strategy of a desperate legal team that doesn’t understand the law, facts, or that their client is a nut with a microphone (or website).

59
De Kolta Chair  Oct 17, 2015 • 12:52:25pm

re: #43 lawhawk

It makes floor shitting look downright quaint.

Are squatters rights at all relevant? //

60
Camacho DeezNuts 2016  Oct 17, 2015 • 12:52:40pm

You can’t handle the poop!

61
goddamnedfrank  Oct 17, 2015 • 12:52:52pm

re: #51 lawhawk

Well, there’s that and the fact that it looks like it was a cram session with nothing but cut and pastes from various sources so as to throw a steaming pile of BS. There isn’t so much as a legal argument or a factual argument to be found that would inure benefit to Chucky. It’s 111 pages of incoherent rage monkey chattering.

Dude spends more than half of the document basically just saying “Gawker is full of bad people” over and over again. As if any of that is relevant to the specific incidents he alleges damaged his client. He also spends a lot of time flat out lying to the court and trying to rewrite history.

Burns’ entire prosecution of the case thus far has been absolutely preposterous. Two extension, a blown deadline and then this insane, overlong soldering tire fire of a legal brief. I genuinely think he might get sanctioned at this point.

62
lawhawk  Oct 17, 2015 • 12:53:20pm

re: #45 Timothy Watson

Not that there’s anything wrong with that. But if he was hoping for the family values support…

63
Sionainn  Oct 17, 2015 • 12:53:41pm

re: #23 Charles Johnson

I suspect Burns is doing this pro bono.

Thereby proving that you get what you pay for.

64
De Kolta Chair  Oct 17, 2015 • 12:53:58pm
65
ObserverArt  Oct 17, 2015 • 12:55:50pm

re: #51 lawhawk

There’s reasons for the 15 page limit. To promote efficiency of the court system - and you have to get right to the point. The ability to request an extension is up to the Court to allow, given the potential complexity of the case or issues.

This is hardly the case requiring a 111 page (or even 50 page) motion of this kind. It shows what kind of lousy lawyer Chucky had because he simply can’t distill the issue into a concise argument.

Well, there’s that and the fact that it looks like it was a cram session with nothing but cut and pastes from various sources so as to throw a steaming pile of BS. There isn’t so much as a legal argument or a factual argument to be found that would inure benefit to Chucky. It’s 111 pages of incoherent rage monkey chattering.

Ha!, lawhawk…I think the key word that explains your comment succinctly is ‘brief.’

I do believe that is why it is called a brief.

The Johnson legal eagle team seem to be building their entire case in the brief.

66
Charles Johnson  Oct 17, 2015 • 12:59:59pm

Meanwhile, Chuck continues posting links to white nationalist websites at his Facebook page.

67
Blind Frog Belly White  Oct 17, 2015 • 1:00:55pm

re: #64 De Kolta Chair

Embedded Image

That’s Rango, at first light, every goddam morning.

68
Camacho DeezNuts 2016  Oct 17, 2015 • 1:01:15pm

We move into our new office on a Friday.

The following Thursday our main/primary competitor shuts down.

I’m sorry, that’s horrible. Yes we’d love to talk to you. Come see us in our spiffy new office.

Ain’t life grand.

69
Blind Frog Belly White  Oct 17, 2015 • 1:02:15pm

re: #65 ObserverArt

Ha!, lawhawk…I think the key word that explains your comment succinctly is ‘brief.’

I do believe that is why it is called a brief.

The Johnson legal eagle team seem to be building their entire case in the brief.

If brevity is the soul of wit, Chuckie filing a 111 page brief makes perfect sense.

70
wrenchwench  Oct 17, 2015 • 1:04:02pm

re: #66 Charles Johnson

Meanwhile, Chuck continues posting links to white nationalist websites at his Facebook page.

[Embedded content]

Chuck personally defeats the whole idea of white supremacy by his mere existance.

71
Charles Johnson  Oct 17, 2015 • 1:04:14pm

Wow. I hadn’t come across New Observer Online before - it’s an outright white supremacist and antisemitic hate site.

72
Camacho DeezNuts 2016  Oct 17, 2015 • 1:05:16pm

re: #70 wrenchwench

Chuck personally defeats the whole idea of white supremacy by his mere existance.

White Stupremacy

73
Eric The Fruit Bat  Oct 17, 2015 • 1:06:18pm

re: #51 lawhawk

So now comes the question after having (ugh) reading the doc, what do you think will happen? If I read it correctly, it seems like if it doesn’t get dismissed Burns would like to get it transferred to CA. Ya think Popehat would pick it up or laugh at him?

Cash up front, of course.

74
Charles Johnson  Oct 17, 2015 • 1:10:18pm

re: #73 Eric The Fruit Bat

So now comes the question after having (ugh) reading the doc, what do you think will happen? If I read it correctly, it seems like if it doesn’t get dismissed Burns would like to get it transferred to CA. Ya think Popehat would pick it up or laugh at him?

Cash up front, of course.

If it gets transferred to California that would be really bad news for Chuck; CA has the toughest anti-SLAPP statute in the country, and it was made for lawsuits like this one. It’s very probable Chuck would be forced to pay all of Gawker’s legal fees, which have to be in six figures by now.

75
Nyet  Oct 17, 2015 • 1:10:25pm

re: #71 Charles Johnson

Wow. I hadn’t come across New Observer Online before - it’s an outright white supremacist and antisemitic hate site.

It’s an outright neo-Nazi website. Headline:

German Patriots Burn yet Another Planned Invader Center

76
Dr Lizardo  Oct 17, 2015 • 1:12:33pm

re: #74 Charles Johnson

If it gets transferred to California that would be really bad news for Chuck; CA has the toughest anti-SLAPP statute in the country, and it was made for lawsuits like this one. It’s very probable Chuck would be forced to pay all of Gawker’s legal fees, which have to be in six figures by now.

Couldn’t Chuckles declare bankruptcy, or are court judgements non-dischargeable debts? (I honestly don’t know…..)

77
Nyet  Oct 17, 2015 • 1:13:09pm

re: #75 Nyet

They also have Holocaust denial articles.

Might be a good idea for a frontpage article.

78
goddamnedfrank  Oct 17, 2015 • 1:13:50pm

Chuck might have real trouble finding a California lawyer willing to defend him if the case gets sent to CAED. Burns could just stay on since he’s nominally passed the federal bar, but at this point one would have to think both he and Chuck would be looking to find his replacement if possible. Also I doubt Burns planned on having to fly to California for court appearances, and if he is taking the case on contingency there’s no money to pay for that.

79
lawhawk  Oct 17, 2015 • 1:14:47pm

re: #73 Eric The Fruit Bat

The judge might decide that this case is just too good to keep to himself and pass it off to the CA federal court to decide. That’d be the best case scenario for Chucky (which also means that Chucky’s hopes of circumventing the anti-SLAPP law will fall apart and where the potential costs to Chucky soar - where in reality it’s his worst-case outcome: all together now, AWWWWW). The judge could alternatively dismiss the case with prejudice (which would actually be the best case situation to Chucky since he wouldn’t face further legal costs, and his lawyers would avoid issues as well).

Put simply - the outcome Chucky wants is actually opening the door to the worst outcome for him. The outcome he’s seeking to avoid is the one that will end with the least damage to him and his pocketbook. Up is down and all that.

80
lawhawk  Oct 17, 2015 • 1:16:58pm

re: #78 goddamnedfrank

Chuck might have real trouble finding a California lawyer willing to defend him if the case gets sent to CAED. Burns could just stay on since he’s nominally passed the federal bar, but at this point one would have to think both he and Chuck would be looking to find his replacement if possible. Also I doubt Burns planned on having to fly to California for court appearances, and if he is taking the case on contingency there’s no money to pay for that.

I hear Orly’s looking for work. /

81
lawhawk  Oct 17, 2015 • 1:20:18pm

re: #76 Dr Lizardo

Think it depends on the kind of debt. Gawker could file an objection that their claim is nondischargeable. It isn’t an automatic nondischargeable debt in bankruptcy.

82
thedopefishlives  Oct 17, 2015 • 1:21:44pm

Afternoon Lizardim from the clear, crisp, cool wild north country. How go things among the lizardfolk as we celebrate the smackdown of our favorite whipping boy, the Ginger Avenger?

83
Dr Lizardo  Oct 17, 2015 • 1:22:41pm

re: #81 lawhawk

Think it depends on the kind of debt. Gawker could file an objection that their claim is nondischargeable. It isn’t an automatic nondischargeable debt in bankruptcy.

OK.

84
Eric The Fruit Bat  Oct 17, 2015 • 1:23:19pm

re: #76 Dr Lizardo

When it comes to court costs, it looks like the answer is no.

85
goddamnedfrank  Oct 17, 2015 • 1:26:18pm
Plaintiffs urge the Court to consider the fact that, should the Court dismiss the case without prejudice, the effect on Plaintiff would be as if the Court dismissed with prejudice. This is because in both California and New York, claims for defamation and injurious falsehood are barred by a one year statute of limitations, which would leave Plaintiffs only until December 9, 2015 to replead his case in either of those states.

Burn is straight up lying here right? Dec 9th is just the filing deadline, Chuck wouldn’t have to have the case pled out by then. Also, the fact that they filed in a court that had no jurisdiction in the matter nobody’s fault but Plaintiff’s.

86
goddamnedfrank  Oct 17, 2015 • 1:28:00pm

re: #81 lawhawk

Think it depends on the kind of debt. Gawker could file an objection that their claim is nondischargeable. It isn’t an automatic nondischargeable debt in bankruptcy.

At the very least he’s likely to lose his website registration. I can’t see a bankruptcy court declaring that as a necessary asset.

87
lawhawk  Oct 17, 2015 • 1:28:09pm

Gawker’s legal team, after reading that nonsensical raving motion, is getting ready to tickle the ivories:

How I Met Your Mother - You Just Got Slapped - Marshall Eriksen feat. Barney Stinson

88
thedopefishlives  Oct 17, 2015 • 1:28:55pm

re: #79 lawhawk

You mention his lawyer avoiding issues. The thing is, as we’ve seen from Orly, courts are fairly loath to apply sanctions, even to known vexatious litigants. What other issues could this clown face?

89
nines09  Oct 17, 2015 • 1:31:59pm

Might this be the final chapter in the Ginger Stool Kingdom Of Grifting Schmucks series?

90
goddamnedfrank  Oct 17, 2015 • 1:32:13pm
“fraud used to obtain money, goods or services, such as lying on a credit application,”

I could easily see a bankruptcy court declaring an anti-SLAPP judgement as resulting from a kind of fraud. In this case the fraud being perpetrated upon the court system itself, and the anti-SLAPP the equivalent of a finding of malicious prosecution.

91
PhillyPretzel  Oct 17, 2015 • 1:32:33pm

re: #89 nines09

We can hope so. CCJ seems to enjoy the attention.

92
CuriousLurker  Oct 17, 2015 • 1:32:47pm

re: #66 Charles Johnson

Meanwhile, Chuck continues posting links to white nationalist websites at his Facebook page.

[Embedded content]

Yeah, lots of language like “invaders” (Arabs/Muslims), the “Jewish” lobby, (pseudo-)scientific racism WRT blacks/Africans, etc. And a RT video front & center on the home page. Seems to be kind of euro-centric based on the subject matter of (most of) the featured stories, but then there are photos of & quotes from Thomas Jefferson & George Washington at the top of the page.

The domain is privately registered, but GoDaddy is the registrar and it’s hosted on one of their servers in the Netherlands.

93
nines09  Oct 17, 2015 • 1:33:17pm

re: #91 PhillyPretzel

We can hope.

He can always work a corner screaming at passing cars.

94
Pawn of the Oppressor  Oct 17, 2015 • 1:39:00pm

re: #76 Dr Lizardo

Couldn’t Chuckles declare bankruptcy, or are court judgements non-dischargeable debts? (I honestly don’t know…..)

Debts for child support, taxes, student loans, and punishments for crimes (financial or wrongful death in particular) are non-dischargeable. I don’t know for certain about civil damage judgments such as this one but I’m inclined to say that they can be fought over, but generally, they are not.

Basically if Chucksie filed bankruptcy in an attempt to get rid of his liability for the judgment debt, Gawker may file a dischargeability complaint in the bankruptcy, there would be a hearing that would last about five minutes and cost Gawker maybe $50 in PACER and legal fees, and Chuck would lose.

The big danger would be that Gawker misses Chucks’ BK filing, Chuck files some kind of motion or Adversary Proceeding to get the debt expunged, Gawker doesn’t respond, and he wins. This happens all the time with lenders who aren’t bankruptcy-savvy but it’s much less likely when the parties are small and non-corportate. Chuck would be legally required to notify a victorious Gawker if he filed bankruptcy, and I’m sure they’d be on the lookout for the notice.

Generally Bankruptcy is the Mother of all Gray Areas. It’s governed by Stephen-King-paperback-sized books of rules, but those rules are stretched, broken, loopholed, or ignored all the time, mainly because consumer bankruptcy is highly local and the parties are involved are destitute. It’s legal small change, and it would be no sweat at all for Gawker to respond to bankruptcy proceedings.

Actually Chucksie’s lawyer would fit right into the Bankruptcy world… Disturbingly, there are a lot of really freaking ignorant, sloppy attorneys working the BK area. A big proportion of bankruptcy Debtors are a mess, too, which is not unusual because, by definition, you’re dealing with people who have failed financially. Some of that is due to circumstance - about 25% of filers are dealing with medical debts or personal disasters - but a certain percentage of people who file have absolutely no clue how to live responsibly or play well with others. I know, I’ve talked to them.

95
Charles Johnson  Oct 17, 2015 • 1:39:01pm

re: #77 Nyet

They also have Holocaust denial articles.

Might be a good idea for a frontpage article.

I might get drastically browbeaten if I post another article about Chuck today, though.

96
TedStriker  Oct 17, 2015 • 1:42:16pm

re: #95 Charles Johnson

I might get drastically browbeaten if I post another article about Chuck today, though.

Gotta pace yourself, Charles…

///

97
Nyet  Oct 17, 2015 • 1:43:01pm

re: #95 Charles Johnson

I might get drastically browbeaten if I post another article about Chuck today, though.

When did that ever stop you :P

98
thedopefishlives  Oct 17, 2015 • 1:43:25pm

re: #95 Charles Johnson

I might get drastically browbeaten if I post another article about Chuck today, though.

I’ve always taken the position that this is your house and you can do as you please. I’m absolutely not a fan of giving Chuck more attention than he deserves, but you know what? This is our time to enjoy his utter humiliation. It would be inhuman of us to keep our mirth to ourselves. Also, documenting his sleazy connections gets it out there for others who may be researching him.

99
Wendell Zurkowitz (slave to the waffle light)  Oct 17, 2015 • 1:43:47pm

The only article I wanna read is how CCJ is now officially irrelevant and no longer worthy of mention.

100
lawhawk  Oct 17, 2015 • 1:44:16pm

re: #99 Wendell Zurkowitz (slave to the waffle light)

The only article I wanna read is how CCJ is now officially irrelevant and no longer worthy of mention.

Poop to that!

101
Eric The Fruit Bat  Oct 17, 2015 • 1:44:51pm

re: #86 goddamnedfrank

Problem is, it’ll be up to the Rage Furby himself as to whether he will be backed into a corner and be forced into letting GotNews go into Chapter 11 (with a possible move into Chapter 7) and him and his Hot Asian Wife into Chapter 13 or 7 should the winds of misfortune blow his way.

Bankruptcy is the last thing he needs, because it will expose every asset and liability that is connected to him. And unlike Donald Trump, this is something he won’t easily recover from. And who knows who we may find has been bankrolling his ass…..

102
Pawn of the Oppressor  Oct 17, 2015 • 1:49:09pm

Oh and about Bankruptcy being highly local…

If, for some stupid reason, Chuck filed, say, a Chapter 13 in Missouri because his “lawyer” is there, it’s still not going to help him because the Trustee for Eastern MO is a notorious stickler for paperwork correctness. File in the wrong venue, miss a deadline, or fail to declare that you owe half a billion dollars of lawsuit debt, and you’d be immediately dismissed. The guy running that shop is a paperwork terminator.

It’s a moo point anyway since he’d have to file in California, but just in case his legal muppet got any funny ideas, he’d still be taking a nice long cruise on the Failboat.

103
Dr Lizardo  Oct 17, 2015 • 1:54:12pm

re: #94 Pawn of the Oppressor

Thanks for the info.

104
CuriousLurker  Oct 17, 2015 • 1:56:46pm

re: #71 Charles Johnson

Wow. I hadn’t come across New Observer Online before - it’s an outright white supremacist and antisemitic hate site.

Yeah, they seem to blame Jews for most of the world’s problems—the problems not caused by brown or black people anyway. Apparently, the world would be a perfect place if only all the mud people would stop screwing it up for the poor white men. Pity they have to suffer us so. I mean after all, historically it was white men of European ancestry that built all the great civiliza… oh wait… never mind. //

105
CuriousLurker  Oct 17, 2015 • 1:59:05pm

re: #104 CuriousLurker

BTW, the Google results for jewish site:newobserveronline.com

106
Eric The Fruit Bat  Oct 17, 2015 • 2:00:21pm

re: #104 CuriousLurker

Sounds like these clowns forgot about Arab Spain….

107
Pawn of the Oppressor  Oct 17, 2015 • 2:00:41pm

re: #101 Eric The Fruit Bat

Problem is, it’ll be up to the Rage Furby himself as to whether he will be backed into a corner and be forced into letting GotNews go into Chapter 11 (with a possible move into Chapter 7) and him and his Hot Asian Wife into Chapter 13 or 7 should the winds of misfortune blow his way.

Bankruptcy is the last thing he needs, because it will expose every asset and liability that is connected to him. And unlike Donald Trump, this is something he won’t easily recover from.

++ It’s not a quick fix. Chapter 11 would require everybody he owes money to, to agree on some kind of settlement plan… Which would only happen if Chuck was like, making any money. LOL.

Ch7 would be relatively quick and maybe he could get out of paying his car loan in full, if he’s lucky. Ch13 would have a bankruptcy Trustee basically owning his financial behind for three to five years and again, he might preserve his mortgage or his car loan but I doubt the judgment would be discharged, and… Um… He’d need to have an actual job. It’s a repayment plan, not a get-off-for-free plan. :P

It must be a weird, wonderful world to live in, when you’re white, proud, male, and stupid, and your brain simply does not see the concept of “wrong”.

Edit: If he lost the suit and then filed bankruptcy, the gossip hilarity would only be just beginning, because his Bankruptcy Schedules would be a matter of public record. Anybody with a PACER login could look up his business. He would be legally required to file a detailed breakdown of his finances, and list everybody he owes money to. If Hot Asian Wife was paying for everything, and he owed $175.28 in unpaid subscription to sheepfckers.com, the whole world would be able to see it.

108
CuriousLurker  Oct 17, 2015 • 2:03:06pm

re: #106 Eric The Fruit Bat

Sounds like these clowns forgot about Arab Spain….

And ancient Egypt, Mesopotamia, the Indus Valley civilization, the Persian Empire, the Aztecs, Mayas, East Asia, etc.

109
thedopefishlives  Oct 17, 2015 • 2:06:48pm

re: #108 CuriousLurker

And ancient Egypt, Mesopotamia, the Indus Valley civilizations, the Persian Empire, the Aztecs, Mayas, East Asia, etc.

Sigh. No, no, no, you’ve got it all wrong. WHITE AMERICAN JESUS. That trumps all. Everyone else is just a bunch of posers. Because remember, none of these civilizations would have existed if White American Jesus hadn’t been playing the Doctor throughout all of history.

110
wrenchwench  Oct 17, 2015 • 2:07:33pm

re: #102 Pawn of the Oppressor

It’s a moo point anyway

Mooooooo

I knew a guy who could not be taught that it was not a ‘mute’ point, so I like a ‘moo’ point. :)

111
ObserverArt  Oct 17, 2015 • 2:07:34pm

re: #108 CuriousLurker

And ancient Egypt, Mesopotamia, the Indus Valley civilizations, the Persian Empire, the Aztecs, Mayas, East Asia, etc.

But wear are they now, huh smarmy pants librul lizerd???!!!

Cuz…Merikas stilll hear!!

112
Pawn of the Oppressor  Oct 17, 2015 • 2:10:14pm

re: #110 wrenchwench

Mooooooo

I knew a guy who could not be taught that it was not a ‘mute’ point, so I like a ‘moo’ point. :)

Moo point!

Link

113
wrenchwench  Oct 17, 2015 • 2:12:53pm

re: #112 Pawn of the Oppressor

Moo point!

Link

‘It’s like a cow’s opinion. It just doesn’t matter.’ :D

114
De Kolta Chair  Oct 17, 2015 • 2:13:12pm

re: #110 wrenchwench

It’s a moo point anyway

Henderson County, NC
115
CuriousLurker  Oct 17, 2015 • 2:21:41pm

re: #108 CuriousLurker

And ancient Egypt, Mesopotamia, the Indus Valley civilization, the Persian Empire, the Aztecs, Mayas, East Asia, etc.

History of the world 3500 BC - 2005 AD:

Even if you count Ancient Rome, Greece, and Medieval Europe, and modern Western civilization, it’s still barely a blip compared to Ancient Egypt, Mesopotamia and India, or Ancient & Imperial China and Japanese Civilization.

BTW that site has a pretty cool interactive map.

116
b.d.  Oct 17, 2015 • 2:24:11pm
117
Pawn of the Oppressor  Oct 17, 2015 • 2:24:59pm

re: #115 CuriousLurker

That’s the kind of chart I wish I could draw in the air every time I hear somebody start a sentence with “In Bible times”….

118
Eric The Fruit Bat  Oct 17, 2015 • 2:25:38pm

re: #109 thedopefishlives

Mullah Nasruddin went to a psychiatrist, who tested him by showing him symbols on a sheet of paper.

First there were three dots. ‘What do those stand for?’ asked the doctor.
‘Three wolves’, said the Mullah.
‘And the two dashes?’
‘They stand for two elephants.’
‘What do you make of these dots and dashes together?’
‘They illustrate a herd of ponies and donkeys.’
The doctor told him: ‘I’m afraid you are obsessed by animals, and we’ll have to do something about it….’

‘Do something about yourself first,’ snapped the Mullah, ‘for all these creatures belong to your menagerie!’

119
Egregious Philbin  Oct 17, 2015 • 2:26:10pm

Poop on da floor, poop on da floor, big messy Chuck making poop on da floor.

120
De Kolta Chair  Oct 17, 2015 • 2:28:51pm

re: #115 CuriousLurker

Cool!

The B-52’s - Mesopotamia

121
Nyet  Oct 17, 2015 • 2:30:03pm

re: #118 Eric The Fruit Bat

A man goes to a Psychologist and says, “Doc I got a real problem, I can’t stop thinking about sex.”
The Psychologist says, “Well let’s see what we can find out”, and pulls out his ink blots. “What is this a picture of?” he asks.
The man turns the picture upside down then turns it around and states, “That’s a man and a woman on a bed making love.”
The Psychologist says, “very interesting,” and shows the next picture. “And what is this a picture of?”
The man looks and turns it in different directions and says, “That’s a man and a woman on a bed making love.”
The Psychologists tries again with the third ink blot, and asks the same question, “What is this a picture of?”
The patient again turns it in all directions and replies, “That’s a man and a woman on a bed making love.”
The Psychologist states, “Well, yes, you do seem to be obsessed with sex.”
“Me!?” demands the patient. “You’re the one who keeps showing me the dirty pictures!”

122
Camacho DeezNuts 2016  Oct 17, 2015 • 2:30:16pm

B-52’s will always get an upding. Every. Single. Time.

123
wrenchwench  Oct 17, 2015 • 2:30:48pm

re: #114 De Kolta Chair

[Embedded content]

Kinda like this one:

124
Kragar  Oct 17, 2015 • 2:35:29pm

this one goes out to an an extra pathetic failed blogger, where ever he may be….

Europe - The Final Countdown

125
CuriousLurker  Oct 17, 2015 • 2:38:00pm

re: #120 De Kolta Chair

Cool!

[Embedded content]

Video

And you can always…

The Bangles - Walk Like an Egyptian

Okay, everyone STOP GROANING!

LOL

126
Camacho DeezNuts 2016  Oct 17, 2015 • 2:38:18pm

Back in high school I was a metal kid and all other music was stupid BS. Watching TV late at night, Letterman maybe, music set is B52’s playing Rock Lobster.

Just gazed at the TV think ‘Holy wowzers, this band is freaking tight.’

Been a fan ever since.

127
Eric The Fruit Bat  Oct 17, 2015 • 2:38:24pm

re: #121 Nyet

Note the difference between the two stories: Mullah Nasruddin didn’t come in with a specific complaint about seeing animals, while your patient came in with with a specific issue.

(“The Commanding Self”, Idries Shah, Pg. 111-112)

128
CuriousLurker  Oct 17, 2015 • 2:40:06pm

re: #125 CuriousLurker

And you can always…

[Embedded content]

Okay, everyone STOP GROANING!

LOL

Ugh, that ’80s big hair.

129
Scott Candage  Oct 17, 2015 • 2:41:19pm

What I like best about Chuckie’s “brief” was the following passage…

“Under Federal Rule of Civil Procedure 8(a)(2), a pleading must contain a “short and plain statement of the claim showing that the pleader is entitled to relief.”

This appears on PAGE 105!!!

130
Nyet  Oct 17, 2015 • 2:43:54pm

re: #127 Eric The Fruit Bat

I guess psychiatrists in Hojja Nasreddin’s time didn’t yet know about schizophrenia.//

131
wrenchwench  Oct 17, 2015 • 2:44:00pm

re: #129 Scott Candage

Welcome, hatchling.

132
Nyet  Oct 17, 2015 • 2:46:04pm

re: #129 Scott Candage

Hi.

133
CuriousLurker  Oct 17, 2015 • 2:46:48pm

re: #121 Nyet

re: #127 Eric The Fruit Bat

I killed two flies today that were in the process of mating. Don’t know how they got in here, but I missed them the first time. Then the idiots tried AGAIN.

I was like, “Sheesh, you should’ve sprung for a room.” I felt a teeny bit bad for a sec, but then thought, “Hey, there are worse ways to go, right? They never knew what hit them and at least they died happy.” LOL //

134
ObserverArt  Oct 17, 2015 • 2:46:53pm

re: #128 CuriousLurker

Ugh, that ’80s big hair.

Yeah…but they are still The Bangles and this guy never groans when I can see images of Vicki Peterson or Susanna Hoff!

: )

135
Scott Candage  Oct 17, 2015 • 2:47:42pm

re: #131 wrenchwench

Thanks.

136
Scott Candage  Oct 17, 2015 • 2:47:57pm

re: #132 Nyet

Hello.

137
Backwoods_Sleuth  Oct 17, 2015 • 2:47:58pm

re: #128 CuriousLurker

Ugh, that ’80s big hair.

I’m reading a silly mystery book and one of the characters is described as having “big blonde hair, the kind that grows on women in Texas and New Jersey.”
And I immediately knew the exact kind of big hair the author was describing.

138
Nyet  Oct 17, 2015 • 2:50:51pm

re: #136 Scott Candage

Hello.

Is it me you’re looking for?

139
Eric The Fruit Bat  Oct 17, 2015 • 2:52:05pm

re: #133 CuriousLurker

During high school, when I did genetic experiments on fruit flies, I used to be able to sex them visually, without aid of a stereo-microscope. Today? Fuhgetaboutit.

(for the curious/trivia-hoarders, females were always bigger, and the males always had a darker abdomen.)

140
Kragar  Oct 17, 2015 • 2:52:29pm

re: #138 Nyet

Is it me you’re looking for?

Why are you stalking a blind student?

141
Nyet  Oct 17, 2015 • 2:52:31pm

re: #137 Backwoods_Sleuth

Image: phil_spector_Hair.jpg

142
Eric The Fruit Bat  Oct 17, 2015 • 2:55:41pm

re: #130 Nyet

They probably had a different term for it among the masters-after all, the DSM is a fairly recent creature.

143
Charles Johnson  Oct 17, 2015 • 2:55:50pm

Here’s Adam Steinbaugh’s post, plunging into the legal weeds in search of something nourishing and not finding much: Lawsplainer: Why Chuck C. Johnson Is About to Get MOED Down.

144
thedopefishlives  Oct 17, 2015 • 2:56:43pm

re: #136 Scott Candage

Hello.

Welcome to the lizardfolk. It’s a strange trip. New hatchlings are usually required to bring coffee and donuts to the next ebil librul council meeting. Trolls are served on a barbecue with a variety of savory sauces. Any questions can be directed to the Big Boss.

145
Backwoods_Sleuth  Oct 17, 2015 • 2:56:54pm
146
Kid A  Oct 17, 2015 • 2:58:49pm

re: #42 goddamnedfrank

[Embedded content]

Okay, I admit I am totally lost. What’s up with all the blank posts?

147
Nyet  Oct 17, 2015 • 2:59:20pm

re: #144 thedopefishlives

Welcome to the lizardfolk. It’s a strange trip. New hatchlings are usually required to bring coffee and donuts beer to the next ebil librul council meeting. Trolls are served on a barbecue with a variety of savory sauces. Any questions can be directed to the Big Boss.

148
Kid A  Oct 17, 2015 • 2:59:47pm

re: #129 Scott Candage

Greetings, hatchling.

149
CuriousLurker  Oct 17, 2015 • 2:59:55pm

re: #139 Eric The Fruit Bat

Oh god, we had to do the fruit flies in petri dishes thing in junior high. To this day I still think of Gregor Mendel every time I see a fruit fly (even though he used pea plants).

150
Scott Candage  Oct 17, 2015 • 3:00:41pm

re: #144 thedopefishlives

Thanks for the welcome. I’ll bring an assortment of donuts, but I WON’T bring any pumpkin-spiced lattes to the meeting. You’ll all drink vanilla lattes and you’ll LIKE IT!

151
Scott Candage  Oct 17, 2015 • 3:00:56pm

re: #148 Kid A

Thanks muchly.

152
Kid A  Oct 17, 2015 • 3:01:12pm

re: #140 Kragar

Why are you stalking a blind student?

153
Scott Candage  Oct 17, 2015 • 3:01:34pm

re: #147 Nyet

Did someone say beer?

154
Kid A  Oct 17, 2015 • 3:01:43pm

re: #151 Scott Candage

Thanks muchly.

Long time lurker, first time lizard?

155
thedopefishlives  Oct 17, 2015 • 3:02:11pm

re: #153 Scott Candage

Did someone say beer?

Drinking is a popular pastime here, for reasons that will become obvious shortly if you haven’t already gathered from lurking. It’s how we stay sane in an obviously batshit crazy world.

156
Nyet  Oct 17, 2015 • 3:02:31pm

re: #149 CuriousLurker

Oh god, we had to do the fruit flies in petri dishes thing in junior high. To this day I still think of Gregor Mendel every time I see a fruit fly (even though he used pea plants).

Mukholyuby-chelovekonenavistniki.
“Fly lovers-human haters” - a description of geneticists in Stalin’s press.

Of course, some still can’t get over things like fruit fly research in Paris, France.

157
Backwoods_Sleuth  Oct 17, 2015 • 3:02:33pm
158
CuriousLurker  Oct 17, 2015 • 3:02:57pm

re: #150 Scott Candage

I prefer latte flavored lattes. Welcome.

The (unofficial) LGF theme song:

Three Dog Night - Mama told me not to come 1970

159
Scott Candage  Oct 17, 2015 • 3:03:03pm

re: #154 Kid A

Pretty much. Charles and I follow each other on Twitter, and I read his site as regularly as I read any blog, but I felt like contributing. So here I am.

160
Charles Johnson  Oct 17, 2015 • 3:03:39pm

re: #159 Scott Candage

Pretty much. Charles and I follow each other on Twitter, and I read his site as regularly as I read any blog, but I felt like contributing. So here I am.

Hey, good to see you here! Thanks for registering.

161
Scott Candage  Oct 17, 2015 • 3:03:39pm

re: #155 thedopefishlives

Sanity? Maybe I’m in the wrong place…

162
Scott Candage  Oct 17, 2015 • 3:04:13pm

re: #160 Charles Johnson

Glad to join, and thanks for the nice welcome (from you and everyone).

163
Charles Johnson  Oct 17, 2015 • 3:05:24pm

Here’s Chuck’s full affidavit, by the way, denying he poops on the floor and has sex with animals.

164
thedopefishlives  Oct 17, 2015 • 3:05:57pm

re: #161 Scott Candage

Sanity? Maybe I’m in the wrong place…

Oooh, I like this one. Can we keep him?

165
Nyet  Oct 17, 2015 • 3:06:32pm

re: #163 Charles Johnson

Thanks!

166
thedopefishlives  Oct 17, 2015 • 3:06:33pm

re: #163 Charles Johnson

To quote from the article you linked upthread:

If you find yourself testifying under oath about not having defecated on a floor — publicly or privately — something has gone terribly wrong in your life.

167
Timothy Watson  Oct 17, 2015 • 3:07:20pm

re: #163 Charles Johnson

Here’s Chuck’s full affidavit, by the way, denying he poops on the floor and has sex with animals.

[Embedded content]

So Chuckie just perjured himself?

168
Timothy Watson  Oct 17, 2015 • 3:08:36pm

re: #163 Charles Johnson

Here’s Chuck’s full affidavit, by the way, denying he poops on the floor and has sex with animals.

[Embedded content]

And do I want to know what exhibits 1-90 were?

169
Nyet  Oct 17, 2015 • 3:09:03pm

re: #167 Timothy Watson

So Chuckie just perjured himself?

In what sense?

170
Varek Raith  Oct 17, 2015 • 3:10:22pm
Presumably, the court also can has cheezburgers.

I laughed.

171
Timothy Watson  Oct 17, 2015 • 3:11:12pm

re: #169 Nyet

In what sense?

In the affidavit he attests under the pains of perjury that everything he said in the affidavit was true.

He’s lied on numerous occasions in his “career”, he never posts retractions, and he has post stuff he knew to be false or had a strong basis to believe the same.

172
Nyet  Oct 17, 2015 • 3:11:41pm

re: #171 Timothy Watson

Gotcha.

173
Nyet  Oct 17, 2015 • 3:12:53pm

So he perjured himself by lying about not lying.
Wrap your head around that.

174
Joe Bacon  Oct 17, 2015 • 3:14:00pm

OMG, if this case actually goes to court and it’s televised on Court TV, it will be an endless laugh riot!

Just think of Senator Cochran on the stand while Gawker questions him about Chuck’s pal sneaking into the nursing home to spy on his dying wife…

175
Eric The Fruit Bat  Oct 17, 2015 • 3:15:23pm

re: #149 CuriousLurker

There are hundreds of mutations in Drosophila Melanogaster. If your science teacher was especially nasty, he could make you take white eyed flies and breed them for a few generations to discover that that are true recessive breeding white eyed flies and and a pair of recessive gene flies that when bred together would yield white eyed flies.

176
Scott Candage  Oct 17, 2015 • 3:17:03pm

re: #175 Eric The Fruit Bat

My brain hurts

177
Eric The Fruit Bat  Oct 17, 2015 • 3:17:21pm
178
Charles Johnson  Oct 17, 2015 • 3:17:29pm
179
Nyet  Oct 17, 2015 • 3:20:16pm

re: #178 Charles Johnson

Ewwwe!

180
BeenHereAwhile  Oct 17, 2015 • 3:20:19pm

re: #102 Pawn of the Oppressor

Oh and about Bankruptcy being highly local…

If, for some stupid reason, Chuck filed, say, a Chapter 13 in Missouri because his “lawyer” is there, it’s still not going to help him because the Trustee for Eastern MO is a notorious stickler for paperwork correctness. File in the wrong venue, miss a deadline, or fail to declare that you owe half a billion dollars of lawsuit debt, and you’d be immediately dismissed. The guy running that shop is a paperwork terminator.

It’s a moo point anyway since he’d have to file in California, but just in case his legal muppet got any funny ideas, he’d still be taking a nice long cruise on the Failboat.

IIRC, Bankruptcy Trustees get 25% of $5,000, 10% next $45,000, 5% @$100k, & 3% @$1m.

So they tend to be sticklers for correct paperwork. Plus bad paperwork pisses off the Bankruptcy Judge, and the creditors committee.

181
Varek Raith  Oct 17, 2015 • 3:24:55pm

re: #178 Charles Johnson

[Embedded content]

*_*

182
wrenchwench  Oct 17, 2015 • 3:25:20pm

re: #159 Scott Candage

Pretty much. Charles and I follow each other on Twitter, and I read his site as regularly as I read any blog, but I felt like contributing. So here I am.

You could put your Twitter name in your LGF profile and the rest of us could follow you too!

183
Scott Candage  Oct 17, 2015 • 3:26:29pm

re: #182 wrenchwench

Good idea, thanks. (it’s @scottcandage - I’m kind of boring with names)

184
CuriousLurker  Oct 17, 2015 • 3:28:00pm

re: #175 Eric The Fruit Bat

Speaking of genetic mutations, I’m reminded of an Indian proverb:

Do not blame God for having created the tiger, but thank Him for not having given it wings.

Which brings me back to Mullah Nasruddin:

One hot day, Nasruddin was taking it easy in the shade of a walnut tree. After a time, he started speculatively eyeing the huge pumpkins growing on vines and the small walnuts growing on a majestic tree.

“Sometimes I just can’t understand the ways of God!” he mused, “Just fancy letting tiny walnuts grow on so majestic a tree and huge pumpkins on the delicate vines!”

Just then a walnut snapped off and fell smack on Mullah Nasreddin’s bald head. He got up at once, and lifting up his hands and face to heavens in supplication, said, “Oh, my God! Forgive my questioning your ways! You are all-wise. Where would I have been now, if pumpkins grew on trees!”

And on that note, I’m outta here.

G’nite lizards. ;-)

185
Kid A  Oct 17, 2015 • 3:30:15pm

re: #183 Scott Candage

Good idea, thanks. (it’s @scottcandage - I’m kind of boring with names)

Followed.

186
Varek Raith  Oct 17, 2015 • 3:30:15pm

re: #184 CuriousLurker

Do not blame God for having created the tiger, but thank Him for not having given it wings.

That would be one sadistic son of a…

187
Varek Raith  Oct 17, 2015 • 3:31:53pm

I haven’t slept in almost 30 hours.
Gonna give it a try now.
Night!

188
Scott Candage  Oct 17, 2015 • 3:32:45pm

re: #185 Kid A

Thanks, and I think I followed back.

189
Backwoods_Sleuth  Oct 17, 2015 • 3:37:13pm
190
wrenchwench  Oct 17, 2015 • 3:39:48pm

[…]

City spokesman Udell Vigil said City Hall is “not a free venue for non-governmental special events.” He said a “minor exception” has been granted to the League of Women Voters, which has been holding candidate forums in city buildings for the last 26 years and will hold another next Wednesday.

Similarly, the city let the NAACP use the council chambers for candidate forums in 2014 and earlier this month.

The city decided to “discontinue outside events at City Hall” because of concerns about “the frequency of forums and the potential effect on operations,” Vigil said. That decision was made after the city agreed to requests from the League of Women Voters and NAACP but before the TEA Party made its request, he said.

[…]

Courtney said she believes the City of Las Cruces is following a plan set out by the United Nations — Agenda 21 — that many on the right call an attempt to create a new world order.

Agenda 21 is a real U.N. plan, developed at a summit in Brazil in 1992. It’s a non-binding and voluntary plan for sustainable development worldwide. And Courtney believes it’s the reason the city won’t let the TEA Party use the council chambers for its forum.

[…]

191
Charles Johnson  Oct 17, 2015 • 3:39:57pm

Chucky’s having himself a good larf.

192
Scott Candage  Oct 17, 2015 • 3:42:37pm

re: #190 wrenchwench

At first I kind of felt a bit bad for the Tea person. I could see where, under certain circumstances, they might feel aggrieved.

Then they brought up Agenda 21. And I laughed at yet another Tea person.

193
thedopefishlives  Oct 17, 2015 • 3:43:23pm

re: #191 Charles Johnson

Chucky’s having himself a good larf.

Embedded Image

I’m trying to figure out why our dear friend Chuck thinks this is funny. Lawsuits are not a laughing matter. He should be taking all this seriously (and looking into why everyone is laughing at him and his lawyer). Instead, he’s completely deluded himself into thinking he’s going to win and that his superstar douchecanoe lawyer is going to out-shark the sharks.

194
Charles Johnson  Oct 17, 2015 • 3:44:39pm

re: #193 thedopefishlives

I’m trying to figure out why our dear friend Chuck thinks this is funny. Lawsuits are not a laughing matter. He should be taking all this seriously (and looking into why everyone is laughing at him and his lawyer). Instead, he’s completely deluded himself into thinking he’s going to win and that his superstar douchecanoe lawyer is going to out-shark the sharks.

If you look up “malignant narcissist” in the dictionary there’s a picture of Chuck.

195
WhatEVs  Oct 17, 2015 • 3:49:22pm

re: #150 Scott Candage

Thanks for the welcome. I’ll bring an assortment of donuts, but I WON’T bring any pumpkin-spiced lattes to the meeting. You’ll all drink vanilla lattes and you’ll LIKE IT!

Welcome!!

Thank God for leaving off the pumpkin spice stuff. Blech.

I’ll definitely like it!

196
Charles Johnson  Oct 17, 2015 • 3:50:29pm
197
WhatEVs  Oct 17, 2015 • 3:53:04pm

re: #185 Kid A

Followed.

Ditto. @MsJoanne

198
Scott Candage  Oct 17, 2015 • 3:55:04pm

re: #197 WhatEVs

Thanks, and back atcha!

199
Kid A  Oct 17, 2015 • 3:55:28pm

re: #196 Charles Johnson

Oh my god, that photo…

200
Scott Candage  Oct 17, 2015 • 3:59:41pm

re: #199 Kid A

And yes, I actually checked the wiki to see if it was there. Alas…

But yikes, agreed.

201
Charles Johnson  Oct 17, 2015 • 4:03:23pm
202
ObserverArt  Oct 17, 2015 • 4:03:51pm

re: #194 Charles Johnson

If you look up “malignant narcissist” in the dictionary there’s a picture of Chuck.

With added emphasis on the malignant. That boy’s stupidity spreads and grows.

203
ninja cat  Oct 17, 2015 • 4:07:59pm

re: #191 Charles Johnson

Having to put out in an affidavit that he has never privately or publicly defecated in a floor is bad enough. But it’s almost like he’s sharing that statement on FB with a bit of pride.

204
Eric The Fruit Bat  Oct 17, 2015 • 5:29:52pm

re: #186 Varek Raith

He did create a small one….

Eagle owl in flight high speed camera AMAZING slow motion camera

205
Joe Bacon  Oct 18, 2015 • 9:03:03am

Chuck C’s Mystery Date!


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