Onion: Did the Media Treat Bachmann Unfairly?
“I’m as dangerously unhinged as any man”
Humor • Views: 32,058
92 comments
2 |
aagcobb Sat, Jan 28, 2012 5:07:43pm |
Unfortunately for Bachmann the base she appealed to also thought a woman should be in either the kitchen cooking or the bedroom servicing her man when she wasn’t homeschooling the children or cleaning the house.
| 3 |
nines09 Sat, Jan 28, 2012 5:09:48pm |
She can ask Newt if she can be Moon Colony Princess Michelle if he wins his second term.
| 6 |
Obdicut Sat, Jan 28, 2012 5:14:42pm |
I wonder why she collapsed so badly? I really though this was her year to be the spoiler.
| 8 |
b_sharp Sat, Jan 28, 2012 5:16:45pm |
re: #6 Obdicut
I wonder why she collapsed so badly? I really though this was her year to be the spoiler.
This is the year of the dragon, not the year of the loon.
| 9 |
windsagio Sat, Jan 28, 2012 5:16:55pm |
re: #6 Obdicut
I seriously believe it’s because she’s a woman, that’s just not acceptable.
| 10 |
Kragar Sat, Jan 28, 2012 5:18:10pm |
re: #6 Obdicut
I wonder why she collapsed so badly? I really though this was her year to be the spoiler.
Obviously she didn’t love Jesus enough.
| 11 |
Obdicut Sat, Jan 28, 2012 5:19:26pm |
re: #9 windsagio
I seriously believe it’s because she’s a woman, that’s just not acceptable.
Yeah, I think you might be right. She’s have to be a lot more charismatic to overcome that.
| 12 |
jaunte Sat, Jan 28, 2012 5:20:00pm |
| 13 |
Charles Johnson Sat, Jan 28, 2012 5:20:19pm |
There’s a new feature in the Pages posting form - a “Title Case” button that will automagically take your current title and apply some sophisticated rules to capitalize it according to the usual standards for title case, leaving words like ‘a’ and ‘the’ uncapitalized. It’s a pretty smart routine that handles most of the edge cases (e.g. words like “iPod” and “vs.”).
Very handy for making your titles pop out. I recommend it to all Pages authors.
| 14 |
b_sharp Sat, Jan 28, 2012 5:20:46pm |
re: #10 Kragar (Proud to be Kafir)
Obviously she didn’t love Jesus enough.
Or in the right way. Nudge, nudge, wink, wink.
| 15 |
Targetpractice Sat, Jan 28, 2012 5:22:09pm |
| 16 |
SidewaysQuark Sat, Jan 28, 2012 5:22:39pm |
It’s been a fun ride watching the flavors of the month in the Republican Primary race to the front:
Trump, Bachmann, Perry, Cain, Santorum, and Gingrich all had their 15 minutes as the GOP’s “front-runner”. (Did I miss anyone?)
Unfortunately for all of the above, it only matters who’s the flavor of the month NOW. Mitt has been a smart enough campaigner to not sprint to the front of the pack during a marathon.
| 17 |
jhrhv Sat, Jan 28, 2012 5:23:44pm |
Just wondering has anyone seen Bachmann’s long form birth certificate?
///
| 20 |
Jimmah Sat, Jan 28, 2012 5:26:08pm |
| 23 |
windsagio Sat, Jan 28, 2012 5:28:17pm |
re: #11 Obdicut
Yeah, I think you might be right. She’s have to be a lot more charismatic to overcome that.
might be a splitting the difference problem.
The folks she most appeals to are the same folks who least want to see a woman vote, let alone be president.
~~~
Also as I think of it, Santorum is probalby murdering her, hits the same buttons but male and less outright crazy.
| 24 |
PhillyPretzel Sat, Jan 28, 2012 5:29:20pm |
re: #22 Stanley Sea
I am getting a sandtimer and a slower pc. dang
| 25 |
Targetpractice Sat, Jan 28, 2012 5:29:29pm |
re: #16 SidewaysQuark
It’s been a fun ride watching the flavors of the month in the Republican Primary race to the front:
Trump, Bachmann, Perry, Cain, Santorum, and Gingrich all had their 15 minutes as the GOP’s “front-runner”. (Did I miss anyone?)
Unfortunately for all of the above, it only matters who’s the flavor of the month NOW. Mitt has been a smart enough campaigner to not sprint to the front of the pack during a marathon.
Santorum never really had a 15 minutes, or at least not as long as the other Not-Romneys. He’s had lukewarm support at best, and only after Iowa. No, he’s never going to be the flavor of the month, especially if he drops out after Florida.
| 26 |
wrenchwench Sat, Jan 28, 2012 5:30:19pm |
re: #18 Obdicut
Vanilla is the most popular flavor.
I’m going for chocolate in November.
Yo, is that racist?
| 27 |
Kragar Sat, Jan 28, 2012 5:30:58pm |
re: #17 jhrhv
Just wondering has anyone seen Bachmann’s long form birth certificate?
///
Just asking questions…
| 28 |
austin_blue Sat, Jan 28, 2012 5:31:03pm |
| 29 |
Fat Bastard Vegetarian Sat, Jan 28, 2012 5:31:30pm |
What can The Onion possibly say about Bachmann that she can’t say herself in a crazier, more ridiculous way?
| 30 |
Fat Bastard Vegetarian Sat, Jan 28, 2012 5:33:04pm |
| 31 |
b_sharp Sat, Jan 28, 2012 5:34:24pm |
re: #26 wrenchwench
I’m going for chocolate in November.
Yo, is that racist?
No, it just makes me want to slather chocolate all over myself.
| 32 |
Four More Tears Sat, Jan 28, 2012 5:34:37pm |
I so want to believe this exchange happened:
“Why do people take such an instant dislike to me?” asked a perplexed Gingrich, to whom Dole bluntly explained: “Because it saves them time.”
| 33 |
jhrhv Sat, Jan 28, 2012 5:34:42pm |
re: #27 Kragar (Proud to be Kafir)
Actually watching tivo of Betty White’s 90’th birthday. There was a clip of the POTUS writing her a letter. He writes something like *I can’t believe you’re 90 so would you mind sending me your long form birth certificate*.
Betty got to see Halley’s comet twice. -Ray Romano
| 34 |
Kragar Sat, Jan 28, 2012 5:35:06pm |
re: #30 Fat Bastard Vegetarian
The Sun. It’s after us.
Newt declares a war on the sun, tells NASA to figure out how to destroy it.
| 36 |
Four More Tears Sat, Jan 28, 2012 5:35:38pm |
re: #34 Kragar (Proud to be Kafir)
Newt declares a war on the sun, tells NASA to figure out how to destroy it.
With missiles from the moon, obviously. Pay closer attention.
| 37 |
austin_blue Sat, Jan 28, 2012 5:36:13pm |
By the way, Austin City Limits has Florence + The Machine and Lykke Li this week.
A little too performance art/pop-tart for my taste but interesting nevertheless.
| 38 |
Kragar Sat, Jan 28, 2012 5:37:10pm |
re: #36 JasonA
With missiles from the moon, obviously. Pay closer attention.
Of course, Santorum would say that attacking the Sun is crazy because Global Warming doesn’t exist.
| 39 |
b_sharp Sat, Jan 28, 2012 5:37:23pm |
re: #24 PhillyPretzel
I am getting a sandtimer and a slower pc. dang
Why, is the one you have too fast?
| 40 |
b_sharp Sat, Jan 28, 2012 5:38:15pm |
re: #25 Targetpractice, Worst of Both Worlds
Santorum never really had a 15 minutes, or at least not as long as the other Not-Romneys. He’s had lukewarm support at best, and only after Iowa. No, he’s never going to be the flavor of the month, especially if he drops out after Florida.
Did you actually say ‘flavor of the month’ about Santorum?
Ewww.
| 41 |
Four More Tears Sat, Jan 28, 2012 5:38:17pm |
re: #38 Kragar (Proud to be Kafir)
Of course, Santorum would say that attacking the Sun is crazy because Global Warming doesn’t exist.
The sun is an idol for the sun god. It’s all in the Bible, I’m sure.
| 42 |
wrenchwench Sat, Jan 28, 2012 5:38:30pm |
re: #31 b_sharp
No, it just makes me want to slather chocolate all over myself.
Don’t get any on the ballot.
| 43 |
Targetpractice Sat, Jan 28, 2012 5:38:55pm |
re: #40 b_sharp
Did you actually say ‘flavor of the month’ about Santorum?
Ewww.
Yes, and in retrospect, I need a shower now.
| 44 |
Charles Johnson Sat, Jan 28, 2012 5:39:01pm |
Ugh. I just finished reading two right wing articles I’ve had open for a day or two but hadn’t read yet. Both extremely reactionary, and both excellent pictures of current right wing thought, and I don’t mean pretty pictures.
Wall Street Journal: Sixteen Concerned Scientists: No Need to Panic About Global Warming.
Washington Times: KUHNER: Obama threatens religious liberty.
| 46 |
HoosierHoops Sat, Jan 28, 2012 5:41:23pm |
re: #29 Fat Bastard Vegetarian
What can The Onion possibly say about Bachmann that she can’t say herself in a crazier, more ridiculous way?
She has got crazy eyes
mann she has got those crazy eyes
She’ll take you down..You don’t have a prayer
You are going on a ride on the Bachmann tide
She’s got crazy eyes
God told her what to do.. You don’t have a prayer
She has got crazy eyes..
I bow before her power
Crazy eyes
This is how I cower
Crazy Eyes
| 47 |
Targetpractice Sat, Jan 28, 2012 5:42:01pm |
re: #44 Charles
Ugh. I just finished reading two right wing articles I’ve had open for a day or two but hadn’t read yet. Both extremely reactionary, and both excellent pictures of current right wing thought, and I don’t mean pretty pictures.
Wall Street Journal: Sixteen Concerned Scientists: No Need to Panic About Global Warming.
Washington Times: KUHNER: Obama threatens religious liberty.
Yeah, I especially love the first one’s argument that the best thing we can do is wait 50 years before addressing global warming, because it’ll be beneficial for the third-world if they can pollute as much as possible to drag themselves up to first-world status.
| 48 |
jhrhv Sat, Jan 28, 2012 5:42:22pm |
re: #44 Charles
I saw some story this week about a something the BBC ran about Global Warming denial. Actually someone posted it on FB. It seems denial is going mainstream.
| 49 |
Charles Johnson Sat, Jan 28, 2012 5:43:18pm |
The Washington Times’ Jeffrey Kuhner: “The pill and the condom are the hammer and sickle of cultural Marxism.”
What can you even say about craziness that intense?
| 50 |
Kragar Sat, Jan 28, 2012 5:44:04pm |
re: #44 Charles
Washington Times: KUHNER: Obama threatens religious liberty.
Not bending over backwards to force others to listen to their dictates = oppression
| 51 |
Obdicut Sat, Jan 28, 2012 5:44:52pm |
re: #49 Charles
The Washington Times’ Jeffrey Kuhner: “The pill and the condom are the hammer and sickle of cultural Marxism.”
What can you even say about craziness that intense?
If you’re using a condom like a hammer you’re either doing it wrong or involved in some highly specialized porno.
| 52 |
Kragar Sat, Jan 28, 2012 5:45:18pm |
re: #49 Charles
The Washington Times’ Jeffrey Kuhner: “The pill and the condom are the hammer and sickle of cultural Marxism.”
What can you even say about craziness that intense?
“Tighten the restraints nurse, and step back behind the yellow line.”
| 53 |
austin_blue Sat, Jan 28, 2012 5:45:37pm |
re: #44 Charles
Ugh. I just finished reading two right wing articles I’ve had open for a day or two but hadn’t read yet. Both extremely reactionary, and both excellent pictures of current right wing thought, and I don’t mean pretty pictures.
Wall Street Journal: Sixteen Concerned Scientists: No Need to Panic About Global Warming.
:::I wonder how many climate scientists would sign a “This is so much bullshit” rebuttal. Think they’d get more than sixteen?:::
Washington Times: KUHNER: Obama threatens religious liberty.
:::”Like many leftists, President Obama has deep contempt for Christianity and democracy.”
When your piece opens with a straw man of that magnitude, it’s FAIL from then on.:::
| 54 |
Kragar Sat, Jan 28, 2012 5:45:56pm |
re: #51 Obdicut
If you’re using a condom like a hammer you’re either doing it wrong or involved in some highly specialized porno.
I DID IT FOR CHARITY!
| 55 |
Targetpractice Sat, Jan 28, 2012 5:46:57pm |
re: #51 Obdicut
If you’re using a condom like a hammer you’re either doing it wrong or involved in some highly specialized porno.
I imagine leather and whips would be involved in that sort of porn.
| 56 |
Obdicut Sat, Jan 28, 2012 5:46:58pm |
re: #53 austin_blue
:::”Like many leftists, President Obama has deep contempt for Christianity and democracy.”
Like those damn leftist Episcopalians!
| 57 |
Killgore Trout Sat, Jan 28, 2012 5:47:10pm |
re: #49 Charles
The Washington Times’ Jeffrey Kuhner: “The pill and the condom are the hammer and sickle of cultural Marxism.”
What can you even say about craziness that intense?
“Let’s fuck, comrade.”
?
| 58 |
PhillyPretzel Sat, Jan 28, 2012 5:48:02pm |
re: #57 Killgore Trout
::: spews soda all over computer ::: ROFL
| 59 |
b_sharp Sat, Jan 28, 2012 5:49:07pm |
re: #53 austin_blue
:::”Like many leftists, President Obama has deep contempt for Christianity and democracy.”
When your piece opens with a straw man of theta magnitude, it’s FAIL from then on.:::
Were Christianity and democracy really linked in that article?
That shows the author’s dishonesty.
| 60 |
b_sharp Sat, Jan 28, 2012 5:49:55pm |
re: #55 Targetpractice, Worst of Both Worlds
I imagine leather and whips would be involved in that sort of porn.
I certainly hope so.
And maybe a nail gun, or impact driver.
| 61 |
jaunte Sat, Jan 28, 2012 5:50:14pm |
re: #49 Charles
The Washington Times’ Jeffrey Kuhner: “The pill and the condom are the hammer and sickle of cultural Marxism.”
Jesus. What can you even say about craziness that intense?
It’s being carefully cultivated for effect. According to Jonah
Goldberg in Liberal Fascism,
“Today we still live under the fundamentally fascistic economic system established by Wilson and FDR. We do live in an ‘unconscious civilization’ of fascism, albeit of a friendly sort infinitely more benign than that of Hitler’s Germany, Mussolini’s Italy, or FDRs America.”
(From a paper by Chip Berlet: ‘Reframing Resentments in the Tea Party Movement’)
| 62 |
Obdicut Sat, Jan 28, 2012 5:50:33pm |
These images from an image search of “condom hammer”, with safesearch on.
Image: pope_condoms_popjam.jpg
Image: 500x_star_wars_condom.jpg
I would not recommend searching with safesearch off.
| 63 |
Kragar Sat, Jan 28, 2012 5:50:59pm |
re: #60 b_sharp
I certainly hope so.
And maybe a nail gun, or impact driver.
A commercial kitchen mixer is more likely.
Don’t ask how I know that.
| 64 |
Jimmi the Grey Sat, Jan 28, 2012 5:51:33pm |
re: #51 Obdicut
If you’re using a condom like a hammer you’re either doing it wrong or involved in some highly specialized porno.
A scene from Real Genius comes to mind…off to You Tube.
| 65 |
Fat Bastard Vegetarian Sat, Jan 28, 2012 5:52:07pm |
| 66 |
sattv4u2 Sat, Jan 28, 2012 5:52:44pm |
re: #62 Obdicut
The 1st one ,,, the KFC one,,,, change just the 1st and 2nd letters in the 2nd word and it WON’T pass safesearch (or at least, it shouldn’t)
| 68 |
Targetpractice Sat, Jan 28, 2012 5:54:50pm |
re: #64 Jimmi the Grey
A scene from Real Genius comes to mind…off to You Tube.
“*We* are? What about that time I found you naked with that bowl of Jell-O?”
| 69 |
William Barnett-Lewis Sat, Jan 28, 2012 5:55:47pm |
re: #56 Obdicut
Like those damn leftist Episcopalians!
Heh. He’s probably one of those that don’t consider us Christian.
| 70 |
windsagio Sat, Jan 28, 2012 5:56:22pm |
re: #69 wlewisiii
Heh. He’s probably one of those that don’t consider us Christian.
An Episcopalian is only one step from a Catholic!
no, wait….
| 71 |
Fat Bastard Vegetarian Sat, Jan 28, 2012 5:57:07pm |
A friend of mine is baking a “Piecaken”. A pie baked inside a cake. She’s posting pictures as she progresses on Facebook.
This is sexy as hell. It’s like porn for fat people.
| 72 |
Achilles Tang Sat, Jan 28, 2012 5:57:07pm |
re: #8 b_sharp
This is the year of the dragon, not the year of the loon.
Why did we not notice that connection earlier (maybe someone did)?
The Minnesota state bird is the loon, and the common one at that.
| 73 |
Obdicut Sat, Jan 28, 2012 5:57:37pm |
re: #71 Fat Bastard Vegetarian
All the biggest eaters I know are hella skinny.
| 75 |
Vicious Babushka Sat, Jan 28, 2012 6:02:41pm |
re: #71 Fat Bastard Vegetarian
A friend of mine is baking a “Piecaken”. A pie baked inside a cake. She’s posting pictures as she progresses on Facebook.
This is sexy as hell. It’s like porn for fat people.
OMG! I so want to make that!
| 76 |
Kragar Sat, Jan 28, 2012 6:03:05pm |
re: #68 Targetpractice, Worst of Both Worlds
“*We* are? What about that time I found you naked with that bowl of Jell-O?”
It was hot and I was hungry!
| 77 |
Our Precious Bodily Fluids Sat, Jan 28, 2012 6:03:27pm |
Kuhner is, if not a birther himself, certainly not averse to playing cards out of the birther deck.
[Link: www.washingtontimes.com…]
Mr. Trump is demanding the president reveal his long-form birth certificate. The real estate mogul believes Mr. Obama is deliberately withholding embarrassing or damaging information.
Since Mr. Obama’s 2008 election, the liberal press corps has treated the issue as a fringe movement - composed of extreme right-wing conspiracy kooks. The establishment media have even negatively labeled them as “birthers,” suggesting they are equivalent to Holocaust deniers or those who believe the Earth is flat.
WHY MIGHT THAT BE, I WONDER. That darn liberal press corps.
Yet, the issue has profound ramifications. Mr. Obama has been the most secretive president since Richard Nixon. In fact, much is still not known about Mr. Obama’s past. His medical records, academic records and thesis as an undergraduate student all remain hidden from the public. This is not trivial. Rather, it is crucial to understanding the man occupying the Oval Office - his background, worldview, intellectual influences as a student, academic performance and overall physical ability to do the toughest job in the world. The American people have a right to full disclosure about their commander in chief.
And it goes on and on and on and on and on and on and on.
| 79 |
HoosierHoops Sat, Jan 28, 2012 6:04:43pm |
Hey Lizards..The Hoopster is in travel mode.. Be back in Oklahoma for lunch.
The last 2 weeks..Well what can I say? All my Superbowl plans for Monday in Indy are up in the air..We’ll see what Happens..Maybe an All night road trip this weekend to be at the SB. I want to ride the Zip line dang it!
Thanks to all of the gracious Lizards here who have sent such kind thoughts and prayers for my Father last week.
Thank you..
| 80 |
jhrhv Sat, Jan 28, 2012 6:05:18pm |
Betty White on facebook:
Before 2010 I didn’t know what facebook was. Now that I know what it is it seems like a huge waste of time.
| 81 |
PhillyPretzel Sat, Jan 28, 2012 6:05:26pm |
re: #75 Alouette
Pie cake: [Link: search.yahoo.com…]
| 82 |
TedStriker Sat, Jan 28, 2012 6:05:56pm |
re: #64 Jimmi the Grey
A scene from Real Genius comes to mind…off to You Tube.
re: #68 Targetpractice, Worst of Both Worlds
“*We* are? What about that time I found you naked with that bowl of Jell-O?”
Chris Knight: So, if there’s anything I can do for you, or, more to the point, to you, you just let me know.
Susan: Can you hammer a six-inch spike through a board with your penis?
Chris Knight: Not right now.
Susan: A girl’s gotta have her standards.
| 83 |
BongCrodny Sat, Jan 28, 2012 6:06:00pm |
re: #46 HoosierHoops
She has got crazy eyes
mann she has got those crazy eyes
She’ll take you down..You don’t have a prayer
You are going on a ride on the Bachmann tide
She’s got crazy eyes
God told her what to do.. You don’t have a prayer
She has got crazy eyes..
I bow before her power
Crazy eyes
This is how I cower
Crazy Eyes
This one works, too:
Sometimes she’s soft
Sometimes she’s scaly
Her mama said that even
Back when she was a baby
She had ragin’ eyes, ragin’ eyes
She’s got ragin’ eyes
Who wants to tell her
Ragin’ eyes, oh ragin’ eyes
Not this fellow, ragin’ eyes
Well she can work those lights
So they fiddle with the traffic
Somettmes she’s mean
As an M- 16 automatic
Oh, she got raging eyes
— Nick Lowe
| 85 |
Mostly sane, most of the time. Sat, Jan 28, 2012 6:07:31pm |
Watching clips from Bette White’s birthday gala.
My goodness, she is gracious and humble. Or at least, she’s coming across that way.
| 86 |
Jimmah Sat, Jan 28, 2012 6:07:37pm |
re: #44 Charles
Ugh. I just finished reading two right wing articles I’ve had open for a day or two but hadn’t read yet. Both extremely reactionary, and both excellent pictures of current right wing thought, and I don’t mean pretty pictures.
Wall Street Journal: Sixteen Concerned Scientists: No Need to Panic About Global Warming.
Washington Times: KUHNER: Obama threatens religious liberty.
Meanwhile in the UK, the Daily Mail, echoing it’s infamous “Hurrah For The Blackshirts” piece from 1934, now shills for Marina Le Pen:
French downgrade shows that Marine Le Pen’s role in French public life is not just legitimate but increasingly necessary
| 88 |
Fat Bastard Vegetarian Sat, Jan 28, 2012 6:10:55pm |
re: #81 PhillyPretzel
I’m sure there’s a low-cal version.
/
| 89 |
PhillyPretzel Sat, Jan 28, 2012 6:13:05pm |
re: #88 Fat Bastard Vegetarian
If that were only true we would make millions. /
| 90 |
Obdicut Sat, Jan 28, 2012 6:14:39pm |
| 91 |
sattv4u2 Sat, Jan 28, 2012 6:14:42pm |
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