LGF

-RetweetCola Jihad

Wed, Oct 16, 2002 at 5:57:22 pm PDT

Come on. Admit it. You’ve been breathlessly waiting for more information about Zam Zam Cola, the “slightly sickly” Islamic carbonated beverage guaranteed to contain no pork whatsoever.

Turns out we have a cola jihad going on.

Ten million bottles of Zam Zam have been exported to Saudi Arabia and Gulf countries in the past four months and the Iranians are working overtime to churn out enough of their cola to slake the thirsts of the two million Muslims expected in Saudi Arabia for the annual pilgrimage to Mecca.

This cola has been so successful that others are racing to get in on the act. Tawfiq Mathlouthi, a French Muslim entrepreneur, will launch Mecca Cola in Paris next month. No superstar is being paid millions to sing its jingle but there will be an advertising campaign promising that 10 per cent of the profits will go to a Palestinian children’s charity.

Mathlouthi admits he has taken the idea from the producers of Zam Zam but says he has had inquiries from interested parties in Belgium and the Netherlands. He has high hopes that British Muslims may acquire a taste for it as well.

What’s that smell? Perhaps my nose is deceiving me, but I could swear I caught a faint whiff of capitalism.

Mr Mathlouthi said his Mecca Cola would “answer the needs of world citizens by contributing to the fight against American imperialism and the fascism of the Zionist entity”. The advertising men promise to come up with a snappier slogan.

Yes, well. Whatever works with the target audience.

Mecca Cola has a tough competitor in Zam Zam, however, which is already recognized as the Islamic cola juggernaut.

The cola is named after the waters that flow from the Zamzam holy spring in Mecca. It exceeded all expectations by selling four million cans in its first week. After the success of its original cola, Zam Zam now comes in other flavours such as orange, lemon and lime.

The company, which also produces non-alcoholic “Islamic beer”, has a long pedigree in Iran, where it was founded in 1954 and today has 47 per cent of the domestic market. For many years it was the Iranian partner of Pepsi-Cola until their contract was ended after the 1979 revolution.

Zam Zam was taken over by the Foundation of the Dispossessed, a powerful state charity run by clerics, and today it employs more than 7,000 people in its 17 factories in Iran. They are now planning to build factories in the Persian Gulf.

Its cola is already exported to Saudi Arabia, Bahrain, Qatar, the United Arab Emirates, Oman, Kuwait, Afghanistan and Iraq, and the company says it will soon ship its drinks to Lebanon, Syria and Denmark — its first European client. Mr Kheiry rattled off the inquiries he has handled in recent weeks from France, Canada, Norway, the Netherlands Germany, Indonesia, Malaysia, Pakistan, Bangladesh and several countries in Africa who fancy a taste of Zam Zam. “After Arab countries in the region started boycotting some American goods, including Coca-Cola, demand for Zam Zam really took off,” Mr Kheiri said.
Advertisement

46 comments

  • Comments are open and unmoderated, and do not necessarily reflect the views of Little Green Footballs.
  • Obscene, abusive, silly, or annoying remarks may be deleted, but the fact that particular comments remain on the site in no way constitutes an endorsement of their views by Little Green Footballs.
  • Posts that contain phone numbers, street addresses, email addresses or other personal information will also be deleted, as will posts that consist only of a variation on the word, "First!"
  • Comments that advocate violence will be cause for immediate banning with no appeal.
  • Disagreement and debate are welcome, but insults and abuse are not, and may cause your account to be blocked.
  • REMEMBER: posting comments at LGF is a privilege, not a right. Abuse that privilege, and your account will be blocked.

Hide comments | Jump to bottom

1 Diane L.  Wed, Oct 16, 2002 4:04:42pm

What "Palestinian children's charity"? One of those Hitler youth type groups?

2 mommydoc  Wed, Oct 16, 2002 4:10:42pm

The Palestinian children's charity which trains young people to be shahid. Excellent!

3 NC  Wed, Oct 16, 2002 4:12:06pm

It can't be long before consumers are asked to "Take the Zam Zam Challenge."

Also:

Mr Mathlouthi said his Mecca Cola would “answer the needs of world citizens by contributing to the fight against American imperialism and the fascism of the Zionist entity”.

I know--I know--there's a jingle in here somewhere. Mr. Wishard . . . ?

4 Banana Counting Monkey  Wed, Oct 16, 2002 4:21:47pm

Excellent. The more Islamic culture turns to compete with western culture than attempting to blow it up, the better. Hell, I'd buy a case of Zam Zam just to get the ball rolling.

5 Ray  Wed, Oct 16, 2002 4:42:04pm

"Mecca Cola"?

If I were Islamic, I would be deeply offended by this advertisement.

6 Jeremy  Wed, Oct 16, 2002 4:45:55pm

Isn't using the name of a holy city in a product a bit on the tacky side? I'm surprised the Zam Zam people don't get one of their Ayatollahs to declare Mecca Cola a blasphemy, or something.

7 FinnAmerican  Wed, Oct 16, 2002 4:47:00pm

Any one up for some Synagogue Soup? I'll pass... just had some Crucifix Chocolate and Holy Mary Mother of God Milk.


OT: My biggest fear? Germs. When I exit public bathrooms, I open door handles with a paper towel that I casually drop on the floor. [Link: sourmash.blogspot.com...]

8 Denny Wilson  Wed, Oct 16, 2002 4:53:32pm

And I always thought the Iranians would produce Ayatollah Cola. Motto: It gives everyone gas but Americans.

9 d  Wed, Oct 16, 2002 6:09:24pm

Ayatollah Cola!

Haw!!!

10 liberal hawk  Wed, Oct 16, 2002 6:15:14pm

Guaranteed to contain no pork??? where i live, Coca - cola is kosher (O-U) - thought that meant IT was guaranteed to contain no pork (among other things) If its not, ive got problems, and some of my relatives have VERY big problems.

11 Homer  Wed, Oct 16, 2002 6:19:00pm

Jeremy writes: Isn't using the name of a holy city in a product a bit on the tacky side?

Well how 'bout:

Jerusalem Pizza
Address: 231 Raritan Ave,
Highland Park, New Jersey
Cuisine:(l,d) Dairy pizza, pasta, falafel

Ummm, falafel slobber, yummm ...

12 Anabel  Wed, Oct 16, 2002 6:35:16pm

All together now:

Singing Rhum and Zam Zam cola.


(Rhum old Arabic name for Rome)

13 selmer  Wed, Oct 16, 2002 6:45:01pm

Zam Zam - It's a killer cola!

14 John-Paul  Wed, Oct 16, 2002 7:21:46pm

Isnt carbonated water and high fructose corn syrup a sign of western modernity?

15 Throbert McGee  Wed, Oct 16, 2002 7:49:49pm

Any one up for some Synagogue Soup? I'll pass... just had some Crucifix Chocolate and Holy Mary Mother of God Milk.


Yay, someone else broke the casual blasphemy ice!

16 Elizabeth  Wed, Oct 16, 2002 8:08:41pm

Now they're getting the idea! That's more like it! Filthy capitalism and cutthroat competition will save them from death by Fundamentalism. Besides--it's fun #4 Bananna Counting Monkeys can start counting cases of ZamZam instead.

17 TJ  Wed, Oct 16, 2002 8:09:48pm

#5 Ray, No, its only offensive if it is an evil western corporation trying to pry open a new market by using religion to get people to use the product.

I just wonder when the Berkeley City Council ban Coke and Pepsi vending machines and name Zam Zam and Mecca Colas as the official soft drinks of Berkeley.

But I agree. I think this is a good thing, especially that they have internal competition. They may ignore western brands, but they will probably compete with each other to win market share. Eventually, it may actually taste good. Sure, it may be from the 1st lecture in Introduction to Economics, but once they really understand supply and demand theres no telling what will happen...

18 TJ  Wed, Oct 16, 2002 8:12:54pm

non-alcoholic “Islamic beer”

I dont think it can be called beer if it is non-alcoholic. Alcohol is a necessary by-product of the fermentation process. From what I understand, non-alcoholic beers in the US do contain alcohol, but a very small amount - which is why you still have to be 21 to buy it.

Then again, maybe that is why the phrase is in quotes.

19 M. Upton  Wed, Oct 16, 2002 8:27:46pm

Zam Zam - All the rage for any age, from kicking the can to going bam bam.

20 Ratz  Wed, Oct 16, 2002 8:47:00pm

Wasn't the massive drive for ZamZam driven by the fact that millions of units of Coke and Pepsi were being held up at SA's ports for 'inspection'?

I have to say though, if you want to sell Mecca Cola in France, from what we've seen, “[the] answer the needs of world citizens by contributing to the fight against American imperialism and the fascism of the Zionist entity” is the perfect slogan. The 10% to Jihadi Elementry is another definite benefit.

Though there are some interesting marketing concepts here-
Mao Chao "the snack recommended by the PRA and the Party Council"
Ghandi Gruel "the peaceful breakfast for India's masses"
Turkey Jerkey (I know) " the secular islamic snack, 100% pork-free"
Schroeder Subs (make your own catch-phrase)...

Sadly, I can't think of any packable-foods that rhyme with 'Vatican'
WAIT!

PAPAL PIZZA!

-Ratz :)

21 gerrymander  Wed, Oct 16, 2002 9:06:56pm

Oh, to be a mixologist in the Middle East. How I would love to introduce the Arabia Libre (rum, Zam Zam, & lime) to the ex-pats in the area.

Hmm. Maybe I'll just keep an eye on local Arab markets for Zam Zam's introduction to the States and popularize it here.

22 mommydoc  Wed, Oct 16, 2002 9:26:44pm

Gerrymander--what would you use in place of the Angostura bitters, which go in the Cuba Libre?

23 vaara  Wed, Oct 16, 2002 10:52:17pm

My favorite blasphemous business name has got to be Jesus Truck Repair in Portland, Oregon.

24 Smudge  Thu, Oct 17, 2002 2:41:50am

Save only 1,000 coupons and get a free suicide bomber belt.

25 big red one  Thu, Oct 17, 2002 3:39:29am

"I'd like to teach the world to sing in perfect harmony..."

26 big red one  Thu, Oct 17, 2002 3:42:08am

in case you missed it there is now a Zam-Zam classic.
and of course Zam-Zam light.
is there a bottle return policy in Gaza?

27 Tyson  Thu, Oct 17, 2002 3:47:52am

Isn't there a "He-Brew" God's chosen beer? Like Messianic stout or something like that?

28 microdot  Thu, Oct 17, 2002 3:49:58am

how 'bout an ad w/mean joe green. he gives the kid a suicide belt instead of his jersey.

29 boychick  Thu, Oct 17, 2002 4:02:20am

"c4 goes better with zam-zam"

30 contrarian  Thu, Oct 17, 2002 4:04:55am

"jihad goes better with zam-zam"

ok, ok. stop. please.

31 L. Rogers  Thu, Oct 17, 2002 4:39:52am

BTW, Zam Zam Cola is just as blasphemous as Mecca Cola.

Zam Zam is the name of the sacred well in Mecca from which Hajj pilgrims drink after they've made their 7 circumambulations of the Kaaba monument. According to Islamic tradition, Allah made Zam Zam appear miraculously to provide water to Hagar and Ishmael.

I agree that the appearance of these two competing colas is a promising sign.

32 justmythot  Thu, Oct 17, 2002 4:42:59am

So, Whats wrong with the mideast trying to create a product that they can use and distribute amongst their region? Is the US that gung-ho on their products have market superiority that a little competition scares them?

Kudos to the industrious mid-easterners. Might even take their mind off attacking and killing others...one can only hope.

And all of you making fun of the word "Zam Zam", think about "Coca" , "Pepsi" and "Virgin" cola as names...rather meaningless and equally ridiculous.

33 agent orange  Thu, Oct 17, 2002 4:53:40am

It is clearly a plot by the Mossad.

Everything bad to ever happen in the world is the fault of the Jews. Everything good in the world has originated with muslims.

14 million jews. 1 Billion muslims. Can't you guys do something?

14 million jews control the US, world media and the world banks. They must not have very much free time.

Thank god we have the voice of reason - The UN.

34 Ariel  Thu, Oct 17, 2002 5:04:21am

On the topic of blasphemous names, the whole country of Ghana is chock full of 'em. Every single barber shop is named something like Jesus Christ Barbershop. Same with the grocery stores, etc.

35 d  Thu, Oct 17, 2002 5:12:37am

I hear Zam Zam goes great with those Arafat snack chips (greasy, stale, very cheesy)!

http://www.littlegreenfootballs.com/weblog/?entry= 3173

36 Wack A. Mole  Thu, Oct 17, 2002 5:50:06am

2003 Zam-Zam Cola Ad Campaign

(singing)
"I like to drink a Zam-Zam Coke,
And kill the infidels
I like to drink a Zam-Zam Coke
While I send the world to hell!"

"Waging Jihad is such a thirsty business. After a long day of preaching hate, killing children and blowing up innocents, why not reach for an ice-cold Zam-Zam cola? Refreshing and stimulating, the perfect end to a perfect day"

"Zam-Zam, insist on it when being served by your 72 virgins in paradise!"

"Too much blam-blam?
Have a Zam-Zam!"

"Taste tests show that Jihadis prefer the taste of Zam-Zam almost two to one over camel piss."

37 Wayne  Thu, Oct 17, 2002 6:00:04am

I have to say, all kidding aside, that this makes me at least somewhat hopeful - it looks like they're discovering capitalism. Who knows what might follow ... a revolution in Iran, then maybe spreading to Iraq. Imagine a democratic Iraq & Iran and what that would do for the world's economy

It would be kind of funny to read in history books 20 years from now that the Islamic-fascist dictatorships that strangled the region for so long were toppled by sugar-filled, carbonated beverages ...

W.

38 Mark Edwards  Thu, Oct 17, 2002 6:23:16am

Good thing?..Probably, though a marketing campeign based on xenophobic prejudice, at best will make it a draw. Also if they expect to succeed, I hope they understand the reality that it better taste good. If not, they'll be introduced to another western business concept, ...chapter 11.

39 The Sanity Inspector  Thu, Oct 17, 2002 10:20:32am

“After Arab countries in the region started boycotting some American goods, including Coca-Cola, demand for Zam Zam really took off,” Mr Kheiri said.


It's probably a lousy mixer, though.

Suggested ad slogan:

"Have a Zamzam and a snarl."

40 ronnie schreiber  Thu, Oct 17, 2002 10:35:40am

There are a few kosher wines that have brand names with religious references, Rashi, Bartenura, Kesser. I'm quite sure that the Herzog family named their grape juice Kedem because it is the word the Torah used for choice produce.

This discussion makes me think of the bit in the old Woody Allen movie. The cigarette commercial (remember cigarette commercials?) where someone in a clerical collar is pitching a brand called Holy Smokes. The priest takes a drag, looks at the camera and says, "I smoke 'em", then points heavenward and says, "He smokes em".

I have an embroidery business whose name is taken from the Hebrew word for embroiderer, Rokem Needle Arts, and the hang tags I put on items I produce give the biblical citation for the word. There's nothing inherently wrong with doing business with religious items, or for the matter, advertising that you are a Christian owned company, or are closed on the Jewish sabbath.

If Muslims want to drink Zam Zam, that's fine with me. What concerns me is the attempts to combine modern consumer marketing with iconic islamofascism, like the Arafat snack chips and Osama Bin Ladin cigarette lighters.

Speaking of OBL, I wonder if he has brothers named Sarcoma and Melanoma.

41 Taro  Thu, Oct 17, 2002 10:45:31am

#26 - The bottle return policy in Gaza probably is - bring back your empty bottle of Zam-zam, they'll fill it with petrol and a rag so you can toss it at Israeli tanks.

If not, I hope they don't read this site and get ideas.

42 Peter Ingemi  Thu, Oct 17, 2002 10:52:29am

I have no problem with them earning an honest buck and spending it as they will.

If they however choose to spend that buck to try to kill friends of mine, I have no problem spending my bucks to stop them.

During the 40's Germany still made great cars, we didn't mind that but we still blew up quite a few in bombing raids.

43 Bill Peschel  Thu, Oct 17, 2002 11:07:16am

Y'all missed this line from the post:

Zam Zam was taken over by the Foundation of the Dispossessed, a powerful state charity run by clerics,

Which means Zam Zam's a state-run business, sort of like if Bush was running Coca-Cola.

This isn't capitalism, folks. When we read about a second cola being marketed in Iran, then I'll believe it.

44 Mark Johnson  Thu, Oct 17, 2002 12:37:07pm

Shmaltz Brewing: [Link: www.shmaltz.com...]

Brewers of the mentioned "Messiah Stout...It's the beer you've been waiting for!"

They've shown up at the craft brewers festival in Mountain View, CA the last 2 years. They have a poster with the slogan: "Christ, That's a Good Beer!" Which despite making this Lutheran raised boy a little uneasy I have to admit the poster is funny.

45 gerrymander  Thu, Oct 17, 2002 8:10:32pm

mommydoc - I'm not sure what I'd replace the bitters with. A few dashes of an anise-flavored liquor might work, and ties nicely into the regionality issue. Frankly, I'm not even certain rum would go well with Zam Zam. To state the obvious, taste matters, and I'm currently at a loss for that key ingredient. Gin might make a good addition or replacement, and like anise, is more regional.

If I track some Zam Zam down, I promise to keep y'all informed on tasting progress.

46 Christine Cabanillas  Wed, Oct 23, 2002 7:10:54am

I am working on a research project regarding the conflict of Coke and Zam Zam . . . any links to sources would be greatly appreciated. I am struggling in locating a PICTURE of the Zam Zam cola. Thanks.


This entry has been archived.
Comments are closed.

^ back to top ^

log in
Name:
Pass:

Register Forgot Your Password? My Account Re-send Confirmation (To log in, cookies must be enabled in your browser!)

► LGF Headlines

  • Loading...

► Top 10 Comments

  • Loading...

► Bottom Comments

  • Loading...

► Recent Comments

  • Loading...

► Tools/Info

► LGF Hits

► Slideshows

► Resources

► Never Forget

► Statistics

► Tag Cloud

► Contact

You must have Javascript enabled to use the contact form.
Your email:

Subject:

Message:


Messages may be published in our weblog, unless you request otherwise.
Tech Note:
Using the Contact Form

► News/Opinion

  • Loading...

More Partners

Compare Electricity Prices in your area. Texas Electricity is deregulated; you have the right to choose Texas Electric Rates from among many Texas Electric Companies.

Why not?

Follow Lizardoid on Twitter

 Frank says:

In every language, the first word after "Mama!" that every kid learns to say is "Mine!" A system that doesn't allow ownership, that doesn't allow you to say "Mine!" when you grow up, has -- to put it mildly -- a fatal design flaw. From the time Mr. Developing Nation was forced to read "The Little Red Book" in exchange for a blob of rice, till the time he figured out that waiting in line for a loaf of pumpernickel was boring as f*ck, took about three generations. ... Decades of indoctrination, manipulation, censorship and KGB excursions haven't altered this fact: People want a piece of their own little Something-or-Other, and, if they don't get it, have a tendency to initiate counterrevolution.